Cognitive Behavioral Tools for Addressing Anger, Irritation and Resentment | Clear the AIR

Cognitive Behavioral Tools for Addressing Anger, Irritation and Resentment | Clear the AIR. Prevent mental illness and enhance mental health by understanding your anger triggers.
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#functionofanger #angermanagement #stressresponse

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Function of Anger
• Anger is part of the fight or flight reaction which is your brain’s natural response to a perceived threat
• Anger pushes away or helps you dominate a threat

Types of Threats
• Threats can be to your…
• Person (physical harm)
• Property (Damage or take my stuff)
• Self-esteem or self-concept
• Hurt your feelings
• Make you question your goodness as a person
• Make you concerned that other people will think poorly of you
• Origin
• Things others do or don’t do
• Internal critic/old tapes/others from the past
• Conscience (guilt and regret)
Types of Threats
• Themes
• Rejection/Isolation
• Loss of Control/The Unknown
• Death/Loss
• Failure
• Real vs. Perceived Threats
• Real threats actually exist
• Perceived threats are based on
• Cognitive distortions
• Prior experiences
• Emotional reasoning
• Incomplete information
Activity
• How do you handle threats to your:
• Person/property?
• Self-Esteem?
• How can you handle threats from:
• Others
• Your internal critic (Past Others)
• Your conscience (self anger, guilt and regret)
Anger/Irritation
• Anger is a generic term that describes the fight reaction in response to a threat
• You feel like you can conquer the threat OR
• You do not see any options for escape (think cat in a corner)
• Anger happens on a continuum ranging from mild irritation to rage
• The level of anger experienced is usually in proportion to
• The immediate threat
• The cumulative effect of multiple threats
• Many times when people feel angry, underneath they also have a sense of helplessness or disempowerment.
What Triggers Your Anger
• Threats
• Rejection/Isolation
• Loss of Control/The Unknown
• Death/Loss
• Failure
What to Do About Anger
• Identify the threat
• Explore the automatic beliefs triggering the anger
• Why is this making you angry? (It makes me angry when…. I hate it when…)
• How is this similar to other (unresolved) situations in your past?
• Are there alternate explanations for the situation?
What to Do About Anger
• Identify the threat cont…
• What threat theme is it related to?
• Rejection: Is it really about you?
• Failure:
• Are you globalizing?
• What can you learn?
• Loss of Control/The Unknown:
• What parts of this were and were not in your control?
• What actions are worth your energy
• Death/Loss
• How does this impact how you see the world?
• How does it impact how you see yourself?
Activity
Resentment
• Resentment is anger directed at others for things they either did and shouldn’t have or didn’t do and should have.
• What is the impact of holding on to resentments?
• Emotionally
• Mentally
• Physically
• Socially
• Spiritually (Hope, faith, courage/willingness, discipline, integrity)
• Many times underlying resentment are hurt feelings. (Example: You invited Jane to the party and not me.)

What Do You Resent
• Make a chart with 4 columns, one for each threat
• Rejection/Isolation
• Loss of Control/The Unknown
• Death/Loss
• Failure
• Take 30 minutes and identify as many resentments as you can and place them in the appropriate column (only one)
• Review the finished list and mark off all resentments of things over which you have no control.
• Now, cross off any that have no effect on your ability to live a rich and meaningful life
• Explore how you can accept these things and let go of the anger
• Of the ones left, brainstorm ways of addressing that resentment

Envy/Jealousy
• Envy and jealousy can be thought of as anger at someone else for having something you want.

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