Скачать или смотреть NLP Matching and Mirroring

Please also see https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rWrcV...

Matching and Mirroring

People like to see in others what they see in themselves.
When we communicate with someone face to face and we get on very well we start matching and mirroring each other’s body language. When observing other people it can be like a dance. You often see if a date going well both couples leaning in or two friends that have similar views passionately discussing a subject they are both standing in similar positions waving their hands around to what they say in a very similar way.

Likewise when a date is going wrong you can see a mismatch of body language. Two people talking about something that they disagree about and are not friends act in a very different way to each other.

When we wish to improve our rapport with people matching and mirroring body language is very important. There is a subtle difference between matching and mirroring and mimicking. There are certain times when it would be very inappropriate to mimic someone – for example if they had a nervous tic. Find yourself a friend who you can practice this on. When they cross their arms give it a few seconds and cross your arms. If they scratch their nose, give it a few moments and then scratch your nose etc. you get the picture. Before doing this I find it best to sum up the other person and find something about them that I like. This then enables me to be genuine with my matching and mirroring. Physiology goes further than this you could also match somebody’s blinking or breathing rate.

Matching and Mirroring Voice Tone
Again being very careful should someone have an unusually high voice or someone who has had a stroke, match their voice tone. Do they speak higher than you; lower, faster or slower? Once you have established their voice tone slowly bring your voice into line with theirs. You may wish to try this out when talking to a friend or colleague on the telephone. It’s best to try these techniques out before that important meeting.

Matching and Mirroring Extras

Throwing in some phrases that the person you are communicating with is using as long as they are not too obscure is a great way of increasing rapport. As I said earlier, people like to see in others what they see in themselves. Another technique you could try after some time of matching and mirroring is to mismatch and see if they follow you. If they don’t, go back to matching and mirroring for a little while and try mismatching again later on. Should they follow your mismatching congratulations you are well liked and have definitely gained rapport.

www.paulgoddardnlp.co.uk