Скачать или смотреть The Biology of Belonging: Why Exclusion Hurts So Much

Have you ever noticed how rejection doesn’t just sting emotionally, it actually hurts? Like, physically hurts? It turns out that’s not just a metaphor. When you’re excluded, ghosted, or pushed out of a group, your brain reacts the same way it does when you touch a hot stove. It lights up the same pain centers. So yeah, being left out literally physically hurts!


Humans are pack animals. Always have been. Long before we built cities or wrote scriptures, our ancestors learned that survival wasn’t about being the biggest or strongest — it was about cooperation. Sharing food, caring for the injured, raising children together; those were the traits that gave us the evolutionary edge.


But here’s the twist: evolution didn’t just reward cooperation; it punished isolation. Being cast out of the tribe wasn’t symbolic, it was a death sentence. So, the brain evolved to treat exclusion as an existential threat. That’s why rejection feels like pain. That’s why loneliness can make your heart race and your stomach twist. And that’s why social disconnection has become one of the greatest health risks in the modern world.





CODA Project is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.





Get full access to CODA Project at www.thecodaproject.com/subscribe (https://www.thecodaproject.com/subscr...)