Pastor Brian Haynes - 11/24/2025
Marriage: A Living Portrait of the Gospel
Scripture References
Ephesians 5:21-33
Genesis 2:24
1 Corinthians 7
Introduction
Continuation of the “Families of the Bible” series—after addressing parenting, the focus shifts to marriage.
High-school sports anecdotes illustrate how disciplined practice leads to success—paralleling disciplined application of biblical truth in marriage.
Cultural confusion about marriage contrasts with God’s unchanging design revealed in Scripture.
Key Points / Exposition
1. The Foundation: Mutual Submission (Eph 5:21)
Command precedes all marital roles: “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.”
Submission = humility chosen for another’s good; attitude before action.
Spirit-filled believers sing, give thanks, and humble themselves—marriage draws from the same reservoir.
Diagnostic questions:
• Am I approaching my spouse with humility?
• Do I treat my spouse as someone for whom Christ died?
2. The Call to Wives: Respectful Support (Eph 5:22-24)
Equal in worth, distinct in function—submission concerns order, not value.
Analogy: pilot & co-pilot—same skill level, one must lead for the mission’s sake.
Submission mirrors the church’s joyful trust in Christ’s headship.
Reflective questions for wives:
• Do my words build up or tear down?
• Do I demonstrate trust in Christ by trusting His design for our home?
Respect acts as “fuel to a husband’s soul,” encouraging him to lead.
3. The Call to Husbands: Sacrificial Love & Leadership (Eph 5:25-30)
Three times more space devoted to husbands—no escape clause.
Model: Christ loved, gave, sanctified, nourished, and cherished His bride.
Qualities of Christ-like love:
1. Sacrificial—puts wife’s good above personal comfort.
2. Sanctifying—champions her spiritual growth.
3. Nourishing & Cherishing—tender, protective, honoring.
Leadership is cross-shaped, not throne-shaped.
Question for husbands: Does my wife feel cherished, protected, and spiritually strengthened because of me?
4. The Mystery Revealed: Marriage Mirrors the Gospel (Eph 5:31-32; Gen 2:24)
Marriage = frame; the picture inside = Christ and the church.
A broken frame blurs the gospel, a Christ-filled marriage clarifies it.
Marriage is designed more for holiness than happiness, more vertical than horizontal.
5. Love & Respect—Avoiding the “Crazy Cycle” (Eph 5:33)
Two “oars” of a rowboat: love (husband) and respect (wife). Lose one and you row in circles.
Emerson Eggerichs’ “Love & Respect / Crazy Cycle” video series illustrates how absence of love or respect produces escalating conflict.
Practical step: watch the four 15-minute sessions on RightNow Media together, identifying personal—not spousal—growth areas.
Major Lessons & Revelations
God’s design is timeless, lifegiving, and countercultural.
Roles are complementary, never competitive; equal dignity undergirds distinct responsibility.
The everyday marriage sermon either proclaims or distorts the gospel to a watching world.
Change is hard but possible—believers possess the indwelling Holy Spirit.
Practical Application
1. Daily ask: “How can I love (or respect) you in a Christ-like way today?”
2 .Replace suspicion with gratitude when a spouse begins practicing newfound obedience.
3.Eliminate passivity—initiate conversations, prayer, and acts of service.
4. If married to an unbeliever, live out 1 Cor 7—remain, model Christ, and pray for salvation.
5 .Schedule time this week to view “The Crazy Cycle” videos; debrief with humility.
Conclusion & Call to Response
Like disciplined athletes, couples must “show up” in practice and on game day, applying Ephesians
Husbands will one day answer, “Did you love and lead?” Wives will answer, “Did you love and respect?”
Commit afresh to live marriage God’s way, trusting the Spirit to empower lasting change.
References & Resources
Emerson Eggerichs, “Love & Respect” & “The Crazy Cycle” (RightNow Media).
Illustration: O. Henry-inspired story of Jim and Della’s sacrificial Christmas gifts (“The Gift of the Magi”).
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