The Pinocchio Remake is One of the Worst Movies Ever Made

I'm slightly late to the party, but I had to share my thoughts on the absolutely abysmal Pinocchio Remake by Disney, one of the most horrendously atrocious movies I've ever seen.
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Footage used primarily from Walt Disney's Pinocchio and its new 2022 remake. All footage used is for review purposes and is fair use.
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Music used from -

Athletic Theme - Yoshi's Island
Merlee's Mansion - Super Paper Mario
Termina Field - The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask
E Gadd's Garage - Mario Party 6
Army of Verdane - Fire Emblem: Genealogy of the Holy War
2nd Battle Theme - Fire Emblem: Path of Radiance
It's On Now - Mario Party 8
Deku Palace - The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask
Cold Caller Cubicles - Toontown Rewritten
Unfounded Revenge - Mother 3
Brobot Battle - Super Paper Mario
Bowser's Warped Orbit - Mario Party 8
VS Marx - Kirby Super Star
Tough Guy Alert - Mario and Luigi: Bowser's Inside Story
Trouble - Fire Emblem: Shadow Dragon
Going Somewhere - Mario Party Superstars
On Black Wings - Fire Emblem: path of Radiance
Crisis - Fire Emblem: Thracia 776
Wario's Gold Mine - Mario Kart Wii
Overthere Stair - Super Paper mario
Dark Emperor Hardin - Fire Emblem: New Mystery of the Emblem
The Scions Dance in Purgatory - Fire Emblem Echoes: Shadows of Valentia
Piano Zombie - Plants VS Zombies 2
Rainbow Road - Mario Kart 7

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#disney #disneyplus #remake #bad #pinocchio #animation #waltdisneyanimation #waltdisney #jiminycricket #tomhanks #lukeevans
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0:00 - Previously on Rockotar
0:20 - Intro
2:08 - Jiminy Cricket Sucks Now
3:41 - Gepetto Sucks Now Too (and Tom Hanks is Boring)
4:22 - The Blue Fairy is Incompetent and Stupid Now
5:40 - The Music and Songs Are Terrible
6:17 - Honest John and Gideon/Pinocchio is a Gary Stu Now
7:22 - Jiminy Cricket Jar Character Assassination
7:42 - Stupid Useless Puppeteer Girl
8:07 - Pointlessly Extended Scenes
9:00 - Useless Seagull Character
9:33 - Terrible Puppet Show
10:26 - Jiminy Cricket Escapes the Jar and Fails to Save Pinocchio
11:45 - Blue Fairy Role Mysteriously Minimized
12:40 - Nonsensical Lying and It's a Good Thing Now???
13:52 - Horrendous Coachman Introduction
15:02 - Pleasure Island Sucks and Makes No Sense Now
16:22 - Pinocchio Does Nothing Wrong On Pleasure Island
17:34 - The Atmosphere is Bad Now Too and the Monsters Are Terrible
18:20 - Jiminy Cricket Further Character Development Thrown Down the Drain Literally (Also The Darkest Scene is Ruined)
19:47 - Transformation Scene is Lame Now
20:10 - The Effects Are Atrocious
21:18 - Further Coachman Character Assassination
22:55 - Literally the Only Improvement and it is Extremely Minor
23:44 - Puppeteer Girl Destroys The Movie! (Also Stromboli Was Locked Up I Guess)
25:00 - One of the Stupidest Movie Scenes Ever
25:54 - Swallowed By Monstro Who Cares Anymore at this Point
27:00 - Fire Scene is Also Stupider Now
28:06 - Speedboat Pinocchio AKA The Other Most Stupidest Scene
28:25 - Pinochio's Sacrifice Ruined Now and Magic Tear Garbage
29:13 - Real Boy Ending Ruined
30:45 - The Blue Fairy is a Lier Now Too I guess
31:23 - The End of the Line For Disney Remakes