Скачать или смотреть Two kinds of DUE PROCESS - Substantive and Procedural

You ever notice how everyone on the internet is suddenly a constitutional scholar? Yeah. People yelling “DUE PROCESS!” like they got it off a bumper sticker they don’t even understand.

Well, buckle up, because today we’re gonna talk about what due process really is—and I promise, no law degree required. Just a brain and a tolerance for bullshit.

Due process comes in two flavors:
Substantive and Procedural.
Sounds like the McDonalds ice cream machine of civil liberties, doesn’t it?

Let’s start with substantive due process. That’s the one where the government has to play nice with your rights.
We’re talking about the big ones:
The right to marry,
Raise your kids,
Have a little privacy,
and maybe not have the FBI read your texts while you’re Googling, “Is it illegal to punch a printer?”

If the government wants to mess with those rights, they gotta pass the strict scrutiny test.

Which basically means they need a damn good reason, and they have to do it in the least freedom-crushing way possible.
Think of it like… the legal version of defusing a bomb with tweezers. You don’t just go in swinging.

Now there’s the other stuff—your garden-variety liberties.
You know: starting a business, signing contracts, buying a jet ski you can’t afford.

The government can mess with those so long as they have a “rational basis.” According to them.

You hear that? Rational basis.
That’s it. Not even a good reason. Just something mildly logical.
Like: “We thought it might help traffic.”
Or: “We don’t like your fucking face.”

Ever been to the DMV? Yeah. That’s the rational basis test in human form.

Now let’s talk procedural due process—
This one isn’t about what the government takes, it’s about how they do it.

Think of it like this:
If the government’s gonna take your house, your license, or your grandpa’s lazy boy—
they have to at least give you a heads-up.

They’re supposed to tell you what’s going on and give you a chance to say, “Hey wait a damn minute!”
That’s it.
Due process: the legal version of “Can I speak to your manager? And No, I’m not a sovereign citizen!”

And the more serious the government screw-over, the more process you get.

If they’re canceling your permit to sell hot dogs, maybe you get an email.
If they’re taking your kids?
You better get a full hearing, a marching band, and a PowerPoint presentation with laser pointers.

So next time your cousin rants on Facebook about “mah due process!”
Ask ‘em if they know the difference between strict scrutiny and a proctology exam—
because one’s uncomfortable, and the other’s un fucking constitutional.

I’m just here to make sure the government doesn’t cheat on the test…
and that you don’t sound like an idiot quoting the Constitution like it’s a Yelp review.

Read the Constitution like it’s the comment section of positive video on Instagram just to see how mean people are.

Let’s get off the bandwagon of being simps for political masters and learn what empowers us, not them!