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THIS WEEK ON NEWSSSDADDYYY!!

🗳️ NYC’S NEXT MAYOR COULD BE A MUSLIM INDIAN FORMER RAPPER?!
Zohran Mamdani just pulled off one of the biggest political upsets in New York history, defeating Andrew Cuomo in the primaries. Now, he’s officially the Democratic nominee for NYC Mayor, and if he wins — he’ll be the first Muslim Indian American mayor in U.S. history. But the internet is DIVIDED. Trump called him a “communist lunatic” while the left is calling him a visionary. Oh, and did we mention… he used to rap?

👑 PRINCE OF NORWAY CHARGED WITH R*PE + 23 OTHER OFFENSES
The stepson of Norway’s future king, Marius Høiby, has officially been charged with r*pe, assault, and over 20 other crimes after a year-long investigation. Police say the number of victims is in the double digits. This story is absolutely insane — and sadly very real.

🌍 KENYA’S GEN Z REVOLUTION
Millions took to the streets in Kenya’s biggest protest in modern history. The gov tried to shut it down — banning coverage, blocking internet access, and even using live ammunition. But Gen Z clapped back with slingshots, dogs, and barbed wire pole vaulting. The internet says it’s not just a protest… it’s a revolution.

☀️ U.S. HEATWAVE BREAKS RECORDS — ROADS BUCKLING?!
America is melting. Roads are literally cracking, heatstroke cases are surging, and New York just hit its highest temp in 13 years. Over 150 people collapsed at a school graduation in New Jersey. Yes, it’s that hot.

🚀 JEFF BEZOS JUST DROPPED $50 MILLION ON A WEDDING
The Amazon founder married astronaut Lauren Sánchez in Venice — with Oprah, DiCaprio, the Kardashians, and more A-listers showing up. Protesters weren’t happy, especially after reports the wedding cost up to $50 MILLION. It’s giving Hunger Games.

🎶 GLASTONBURY ERUPTS OVER PRO-PALESTINE CHANTS
First, Irish rap group Kneecap made headlines for their political activism. Then Bob Vylan got the whole Glastonbury crowd chanting “F*** Keir Starmer” on live TV. Now the BBC, police, and even Israel are all involved, and there may be criminal charges coming.

🔪 5TH GRADE GIRLS PLOT M*RDER OVER BREAKUP?!
No, seriously. A group of 10-year-olds in Arizona allegedly planned to m*rder a classmate and forge a suicide note. All because of a breakup. One of them laughed about it after getting caught. Gen Alpha is WILD.

🚛 CHINESE TRUCK DRIVER HANGS OFF A CLIFF… AND LIVES
Insane footage out of Guizhou, China, shows a truck dangling off a collapsed bridge with the driver still inside. He survived thanks to the cargo weight and sheer luck. Yeah, this man used up every life he had.

🇰🇪 FOREIGN EMBASSIES EXPOSE KENYA GOV ‘GOONS’ STRATEGY
Before the Kenyan protests, 13 countries including the U.S. and UK released a warning that the gov was allegedly using paid infiltrators to incite violence and shut down peaceful protests. Then 16 people died. Shocking.

🛰️ TESLA SELF-DELIVERS A CAR
Yep. A Tesla just drove itself 30 mins from the Gigafactory to its new owner’s house. First time in history. Elon Musk stays on demon time.

📉 PEWDIEPIE FALLS OFF TOP 10
For the first time in over a decade, PewDiePie is no longer a top 10 most subscribed channel on YouTube. End of an era.

🚫 TOURIST DENIED ENTRY FOR MEME?!
A Norwegian tourist claims he was denied entry to the U.S. because of a bald JD Vance meme on his phone. Homeland Security says… nah, it was the drugs.

⚖️ CARMELO ANTHONY (NOT THAT ONE) INDICTED FOR M*RDER
A 17-year-old named Karmelo Anthony has been formally indicted for first-degree m*rder in Texas. He’s being tried as an adult and could face life in prison.

🌋 BRAZILIAN DANCER DIES AFTER FALLING INTO VOLCANO
Heartbreaking news: Juliana Marins, a 26-year-old pole dancer, fell into an Indonesian volcano crater. She miraculously survived the fall and held on for four days, but tragically died from her injuries.

💥 UK BUYS NUCLEAR-READY FIGHTER JETS
The UK is buying 12 U.S.-made F-35s, some of the most advanced and expensive jets in the world, capable of carrying nukes. Just a casual $130M each.

👇 Drop your thoughts in the comments — and if you made it this far, you’re the real MVP.
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