How Cleopatra Nearly Ruled the World | The Life & Times of Cleopatra

Once again, you can get 70% off NordVPN at https://www.nordvpn.com/jackrackam using the code jackrackam. FUN FACTS & FOOTNOTES BELOW:

So this is a thing! Didn't quite realize how long it was until I was finished, but there you go! Luckily because of how much I had to cut from this video I've got footnotes for days

Footnotes:

0:28 - No, seriously, that family tree is tumbleweed. Cleopatra had a grand total of two great-grandparents, who were also uncle and niece

1:08 Pompey is best general. Fight me, Caesar scrubs

1:10 Fun fact, Mark Antony was there and supposedly stopped Cleopatra's dad from massacring a bunch of people. Also, it's where he allegedly fell in love with Cleopatra at first sight. Another fun fact, she was fourteen and he was twenty-eight

1:14 No, they didn't actually forget, but the effect was the same: a standing army of Romans inside of Egypt that had been left for the pharaoh's "protection".

1:16 Also, if you remember our boy Bibulus from the Pompey episode, he sent two of his sons to Egypt and the ex-Roman soldiers killed him. Cleopatra executed the men responsible, but Bibulus got all pissy at her because only Rome was allowed to punish them. A lesson that would prove to be incredibly valuable down the line.

1:21 Also a famine was her problem too!

1:51 Caesar's pissed because A) He was typically very good about making peace with his political enemies in Rome, and B) "He was a consul of Rome!" meaning Egypt done interfered in Roman politics

2:17 Specifically he lays siege to Caesar in Alexandria. After Alesia, who in their right mind is going to besiege Caesar? Ptolemy XIII thinks he can pull it off because he had more men, which I'll remind you is exactly what Pompey thought and if Pompey can't pull it off no way could this twerp

2:17 More fun facts, Caesar obviously gets reinforcements to fight Ptolemy, and among them is the son of Mithridates VI of Pontus. The son of one of the Republic’s top 5 biggest enemies of all time had to come to Caesar's rescue, I don’t know if that’s a bigger insult to Caesar or Mithridates.

2:35 You know that thing where Antony offers Caesar a crown and Caesar goes "Oh no, I couldn't". Apparently Cicero had a thing against Cleopatra because he was picking on her the whole time she was there, and made sure to mention "Where'd that crown come from, Caesar? Was it your *girlfriend*?"

2:58 She also built a temple for people to worship Caesar just so everyone can make the connection

4:01 Also among Antony's jaunts across the empire was placing Herod in charge of Judea

4:45 If you want to know why Augustus has such a grand mausoleum, it's because he found out Antony was going to be buried in Alexandria so Octavian needed to stick it to him by making a bigger mausoleum in Rome.

6:40 Even though Cleopatra wouldn't let herself be paraded through Rome, Octavian was nice enough to bury her next to Antony in Alexandria, isn't that sweet?

6:40 Octavian didn't kill the two kids she had with Antony - one went on to live in obscurity while another married the king of Numidia, Caesarion was totally gonna get killed so Cleopatra sent him on a boat to flee to India or somewhere equally far away. But Octavian told him "Hey, no, we're cool, you can be in charge of Egypt!" and then psych! Totally killed him

Music:
0:00 Kevin Macleod - The Ice Giants
0:10 Kevin Macleod - Hidden Past
0:25 Toshiko Akiyoshi Jazz Orchestra - Bebop
4:48 George Michael - Careless Whisper
4:59 Toshiko Akiyoshi Jazz Orchestra - Bebop
6:56 Luciano Michelini - Curb Your Enthusiasm Theme
7:20 Preseren & Premrl - Zdravljica (Slovenian national anthem)