IELTS - How to get band 7 faster?

IELTS success faster when you follow these three steps. Go from band 6 to score 7. For this lesson, we have partnered with Skillshare. Sign up via my link will get two FREE months of Skillshare Premium https://skl.sh/academicenglishhelp6. This video is brought to you by https://www.aehelp.com. Here is a link to a 30-Day Study Plan template, https://aehelp-assets.s3-us-west-2.am... Follow this advice carefully to get ready quickly for the exam and improve by one band or more, go from a 7 to 8 or 8 to 9. This video includes some bonus idioms to learn for the speaking section. Don’t believe in shortcuts and tricks that just don’t work. Plan, practice, and feedback will help with speed and comprehension, improve English and communication. Follow these instructions and you will surely increase your chances of succeeding the next time you sit for the International English Language Testing System. This video was sponsored by Skillshare. Enjoy. Here is the full corrected Task 2 essay:
The ever-growing association of achievement in life with money has led people to spend more and more time at work to earn money. Jobs typically involve staying in one place working on given tasks for a certain period of time and according to the importance of these tasks certain amount of money is paid. Work is a major satisfying factor in people’s life. Work is also the main source of income, if not the only, for most people. In addition, careers help provide purpose for one’s life in general. With fixed qualifications the only way to improve income through working longer hours. Naturally, that means less time for social life which many see as an unjustified price for the more money earned at the expense of leisure time. Provided the time left away from work is less but adequate to have a decent social life, having a higher paying job and therefore more financial comfort is not such a bad choice.
Working for longer hours is the most common way to improve financial status. That means less time spent with friends and family. One other way to make the income more without working longer is to perform tasks that are more exclusive and needs special training and hence one gets paid more for doing them. Practically most people choose to work longer to earn more money rather than focusing on acquiring new skills. Not only are additional skills expensive to acquire, but also their positive effect on the income takes longer. The irony of the former choice is that it sometimes gets too much to the extent that one does not have time to enjoy the extra money earned. The worker becomes simply too exhausted after work and the only activity he wants to do is to eat and sleep. This is why having a job with less working hours might be a better way of life. Some people think that a balance between time-consuming job and an ordinary job with normal working hours and less payment is a good option.
If the time left for the private life, though shorter, is adequate to fulfill one’s duties and needs, spending more time at work to improve the financial status is not so bad. After all, what really matters is the quality of the time, not the quantity. For example, a father, after a long day at work, can take his family to a restaurant that he would not have been able to afford without the extra hours behind the desk and enjoys the delicious food and the nice atmosphere. In this example, the money has “paid off”. Furthermore, the extra money makes it possible to perform new activities or hobbies that might be costly like diving or golfing. Such activities, especially if liked by the person, can have very positive effects on life as a whole.
Even though having less time at work might mean more time for private life, the quality of that time is also important. Money gained through more but reasonable time at work allows improved life quality. I find it absolutely acceptable to get a job with better pay and more working hours as long as it does not completely destroy the social life. This better pay subsequently provides more financial comforts and freedom. In addition to that, it opens the door for new activities and possibilities which improves life enjoyment as a whole.