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The American Revolution as I learned it in school was something like: Studly stud George Washington wins the Revolutionary War, everyone wants him to be king but he wants to be a president instead, and blessed be our Founding Fathers write the Holy Constitution and the Republic is born. But that story’s missing something. The war was over in 1783 and Washington didn't take office until 1789. What happened in between is one of the messiest, craziest times in American history. Half the time there’s no government, the other half Congress is moving from town to town dodging rebellions, America seceded from itself, and some of its states were independent countries.