The Religious Terror Buffet – Brutal satirical song mocking "all religions equal" claims by contrasting trivial "offenses" from Catholics, Protestants, Jews, Hindus, Buddhists, Sikhs, Mormons, Quakers, Jains, Shinto, Orthodox, and atheists with Islam's history of major terror attacks!
Catholics littering tissues? Protestants dog-earing books? Jews jaywalking? Hindus loud Bollywood? Buddhists ringing bells? Sikhs bright turbans? All get "terror" labels in sarcasm, while the chorus spotlights real jihad: 9/11 towers, Paris Bataclan slaughter, Boston Marathon bombing, London tubes, Manchester Arena, Nice truck rampage, Pulse nightclub, ISIS beheadings, Mumbai, Kenya mall, Brussels, Beslan school siege, Fort Hood.
Dark, provocative humor questions the "religion of peace" narrative and Western hypocrisy on equal treatment—perfect for anti-woke, free-speech fans tired of selective outrage.
If the "one faith owns the terror buffet" line hits, this 4-minute roast is your unfiltered take—crank it up!
Like if the sarcasm landed, comment your "biggest terror" joke, and subscribe for more edgy satirical songs—weekly drops on religion, politics, woke culture, and history! Hit the bell for notifications.
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Lyrics:
[Verse 1]
Catholics dropped a tissue on the ground,
Littering terror spreading all around!
Forgot to recycle their plastic cup,
Eco-assault, lock 'em up!
[Verse 2]
Protestants dog-eared a library book,
Corner-fold terror, just take a look!
Left a coffee ring on a borrowed tome,
Bibliographic war crime back home.
[Verse 3]
Jews jaywalking across the street,
Pedestrian chaos, what a feat!
Forgot to signal on their bike,
Traffic anarchy, spike the mic!
[Chorus 1]
But hold the phone for the grand terror show,
Islamic jihad steals the deadly glow!
9/11 towers crumbling down,
Paris Bataclan, slaughter all around.
Boston bombing, marathon mess,
Religion of peace? Yeah, what a jest!
[Verse 4]
Hindus played Bollywood music too loud,
Noise pollution terrorizing the crowd!
Buddhists rang a bell at dawn so clear,
Woke the neighbors, spreading fear!
[Verse 5]
Sikhs wore bright turbans in the rain,
Fashion terrorism, causing pain!
Mormons knocked politely on your door,
Missionary menace, we can't take more!
[Verse 6]
Quakers forgot to hold the door,
Silent rudeness, declare holy war!
Jains swept the path but missed one ant,
Inadvertent insect genocide rant!
[Chorus 2]
Meanwhile in the real hall of fame,
Allah's soldiers in the killing game!
London tubes exploding with stress,
Manchester Arena, bloody distress.
Nice truck rampage, Pulse nightclub spree,
Sarcasm alert: "Peaceful as can be!"
[Verse 7]
Shinto folks clapped twice at a shrine,
Excessive noise, crossing the line!
Orthodox crossed themselves all wrong,
Backward blessing going strong!
[Bridge]
Atheists doubting, that's their crime,
Questioning faith one doubt at a time.
But hey, compared to the jihad trail,
Dropping litter seems like a fairy tale!
All religions equal? What a crock,
One annoys, the other shocks!
[Chorus 3]
For the gold medal in blowing shit up,
Islam's got the overflowing cup!
ISIS beheadings, Mumbai hotel hell,
Kenya mall, Brussels bombs as well.
Beslan school siege, Fort Hood lie,
While others "terrorize" with a sigh!
[Outro]
So next time you fold a page or drop a crumb,
Remember, that's terror for some.
But for the big leagues, it's clear as day,
One faith owns the terror buffet!
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