cc ASTONISHINGLY GOOD IDEA - Dr. Strangelove

Mr. President, I would not rule out the chance to preserve a nucleus of human specimens. It would be quite easy, heh heh
at the bottom of some of our deeper mineshafts. The radioactivity would never penetrate a mine some thousands of feet deep. And in a matter of weeks, sufficient improvements in dwelling space
could easily be provided.
.
How long would you have to stay down there?
.
Well let's see now ah,
cobalt thorium G.
.
Radioactive halflife of ..
hmm I would think that uh
possibly uh one hundred years.
.
You mean, people could actually
stay down there for a hundred years?
.
It would not be difficult mein Fuhrer!
Nuclear reactors could, heh
I'm sorry. Mr. President.
Nuclear reactors could provide power
almost indefinitely.
Greenhouses could maintain plantlife.
Animals could be bred and slaughtered.
.
A quick survey would have to be made of
all the available mine sites in the country.
.
But I would guess that ah,
dwelling space for several
hundred thousands of our people
could easily be provided.
.
Well I would hate to have to decide
who stays up and who goes down.
.
Well, that would not be necessary Mr. President.
It could easily be accomplished with a computer.
And a computer could be set and
programmed to accept factors from youth, health,
sexual fertility, intelligence, and
a cross section of necessary skills.
Of course it would be absolutely vital
that our top government and military men
be included to foster and impart
the required principles of
leadership and tradition.
.
Naturally, they would breed prodigiously, eh?
There would be much time, and little to do.
But ah with the proper breeding techniques
and a ratio of say, ten females to each male,
I would guess that they could then
work their way back to the present
gross national product within say, twenty years.
.
But look here doctor,
wouldn't this nucleus of survivors
be so grief stricken and anguished that
they'd, well, envy the dead and
not want to go on living?
.
No sir. Excuse me.
.
Also when they go down into the mine
everyone would still be alive.
There would be no shocking memories,
and the prevailing emotion will be
one of nostalgia for those left behind,
combined with a spirit of bold curiosity
for the adventure ahead! Ahhhh!
.
Doctor, you mentioned the ratio
of ten women to each man.
Now, wouldn't that necessitate
the abandonment of the so called
monogamous sexual relationship,
I mean, as far as men were concerned?
.
Regrettably, yes. But it is, you know,
a sacrifice required for
the future of the human race.
I hasten to add that
since each man will be required to
do prodigious service along these lines,
the women will have to be selected for
their sexual characteristics which will
have to be of a highly stimulating nature.
.
I must confess, you have an
astonishingly good idea there, Doctor.
.
Thank you, sir.
.
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