Скачать или смотреть Zing Tsjeng breaks down the "growing paranoia" between genders

What’s fueling the growing paranoia between genders?

British Vogue contributor and cultural commentator Zing Tsjeng points to the paradox of choice. Dating apps, she explains, have created the illusion of an “infinite amount of choice” when it comes to who we can date — an impossible mindset for anyone who’s single. When everyone feels theoretically available, they also start to feel, crucially, disposable.

But people aren’t disposable. Dating depends on a shared social contract — a mutual understanding of expectations and behavior. Terms like ghosting, breadcrumbing, and lovebombing have become so ubiquitous they’ve almost lost their meaning. When someone drops flirtatious hints but never communicates clearly, or showers you with attention only to disappear just as quickly, that social contract is broken.

The illusion of infinite choice — perpetuated by dating apps — has only intensified these dynamics.

Our full conversation is now live on all podcast platforms.