In the book of Genesis, the dynamics between Joseph and his brothers, between Joseph and his father, provide glimpses of the intimacy and messiness of reconciliation. Joseph has been separated from his family for years—serving and living in Egypt, a foreign land, far away from home.
In a turn of circumstance, his family becomes impoverished during a famine and they must seek the abundance of the royal lords of Egypt. Joseph encounters his brothers; they do not recognize him, but he recognizes them. In a mysterious sense, this reveals some of the inner logic of healing. Healing can only begin when I see a need for it, when I am ready. Similar to the first step of the 12-step program, I must acknowledge primarily that I am powerless and my life has become “unmanageable.” Or to translate this, that my wound has become foul and festering, and I need a healer, an intervention.
When Joseph faces his brothers courageously, no longer under the disguise of his “new life,” healing begins. You can hear the urgency and longing in his voice,” “Hurry and bring my father down here.” (Gen 45:14) Can’t you hear the little boy, the longing son, who needs to be seen and embraced by his Father again?
—Am I aware of my great need for God?
—Do I feel the ache and the urgency for transparency, for truth, for intervention in my heart and in my story?
—Who in my life does my heart burn to be reconciled with, and do I know why that is?
The Lord Jesus may not be drawing you into a face-to-face reconciliation, but let us listen to our hearts and begin again to hear and know that the desire for communion in us is strong, it is of God, and we must not be afraid to heed its plea.
Practically:
1. Acknowledge the good desire that sits beneath the anger or resentment: I want to be loved, accepted, cared for, protected.
2. Recognize if the anger you carry is actionable–that is, is there a relationship that has a rupture in need of a repair? Identify places you need to repent and ask forgiveness. Identify places where you may need to articulate how you have been hurt, missed, or dismissed.
3. Finally, it may be helpful to articulate to another person your needs. Sometimes we imagine people can read our minds or that they should know. This can help heal misunderstandings and build bridges of intimate trust.
4. Finally, do the work of forgiveness. To forgive another person is an act of will. In the name of Jesus forgive this person for the specific wrong you’ve received; if you can, then bless them and pray for them in Jesus’ name. This may need to happen multiple times as the pain of a hurt is likely to resurface.
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#Catholic #SpiritualAdvice #FranciscanFriars #cfrs
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