Improve your relationship with your partner | Attachment style? | Tips and Advice

@iamwithdhanyavarma
Relationships aren’t easy ..they are not meant to be…now two people who have grown up in very different households come together to navigate and share this life together, there are bound to be differences right? But if these differences aren`t dealt with correctly, the relationship that is meant to nurture you will turn toxic or make us miserable..many of us then start struggling..the feeling is like that of groping in the dark, looking for answers, you dunno if you want to stay or wait for things to improve …you feel stuck..it is a really bad place to be.
So in this video, I will share a framework by which you can analyze the dynamics of your relationship, understand where the issues are emanating from, work on yourselves and see how things change. This video is going to certainly help you find your way if you are in a tough spot, help you understand your style of attachment and by knowing that understand your partners as well. To know more about attachment styles, I will highly recommend this book called attached..

In this world where we talk about self-sufficiency and independence, why do we really need relationships right? The new age social media does give a lot of emphasis on self-reliance and looks down upon dependency. But we are wired to look out for connections for our emotional well-being: We tend to crave love and affection, though the messages through sm tells us that we should not be dependant on others.
Let`s just put it out here first, there is nothing wrong with you if you want to be loved and cared for. If you want intimacy and support. If you are willing to share your loving vulnerable self with someone else. That’s how we are wired. We are humans and our primitive genes look out for companionship to feel safe and grow. It is all okay.
If you are in a relationship or you are looking out for a partner, according to this book you and your partners attachment style is going to determine what kind of a relationship you will have. You must be wondering, That’s so strange right, we are all so different.
So this book Attached is based on the Attachment theory in psychology which speaks about how adults are attached to their most intimate partner. It has been researched and used as guideline by many therapists and there are detractors for the same as well.
We all fall into primarily three different attachment styles. There is a fourth one too, but that is rarer. If we could understand the four, well that could be an eye opener for many of us.
The three Attachment styles that we mostly belong to are
Anxious
Avoidant
Secure
And the fourth one is a combination of Anxious- avoidant/ fearful avoidant or disorganised.
Aren`t you curious to know which attachment style you and your partner fall into?
Let`s figure that out.

About this channel,
I am Dhanya Varma. This is my official YouTube channel. I am a talk show host, actor, emcee, a tedx speaker based out of Kochi Kerala. I was the host of the very popular show The Happiness Project On Kappa Tv. On the personal front I am married with three children. On my channel here I put out videos that could inspire or motivate you to better your personal and professional lives. I cover various skill building topics, ideas for personality development, self-improvement, self-development, changing mindsets and attitudes. I like to talk to various people from various backgrounds and bring forth interviews and personal stories from celebrities and achievers alike. We all need to grow and evolve not just as professionals but also in our more intimate relationships be it our family or our relationships. I also offer tips, life lessons and advice from my personal life experiences. My varied work experience and my professional journey as a journalist, a media person, an interviewer, a talk show host has contributed greatly to my growth as an individual. I wish to share these diverse inputs with you. I believe that positivity and positive mindsets can alter our lives dramatically. Here we have thoughts that you could apply in your day to day lives and help you in your personal growth journey. I love to travel and explore. So you would find vlogs on food ad travel as well here. I hope this channel enriches your life in some way, with ideas and concepts that could expand your worldview.
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