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CHANGES IS SO DIFFICULT MEL BORINS

The only change I ever made is the change inside my heart
First step to make a change is to dream a brand new start
Change is so difficult
All begins by letting go
Reach out and trust
Stick your neck out

Sunshine on a rainy day rainbow lights the sky
Trees by and flowers everywhere birds waving as they fly
Change is so difficult
All begins with one small step
Have faith and trust
Stick your neck out

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CHANGE IS CONSTANT. Nothing stays the same.
I attended a training workshop at the Bayer Institute of Health Care Communication in Connecticut many years ago. The focus of the training was on helping physicians motivate and encourage patients to stop self destructive and non-adherant behaviour and get them to start health promoting activities. We were asked to write a chapter outline for a book about Change to get us to start thinking about how change happens. In addition I wrote a trilogy about Changes.

Behaviour changes come from dissatisfaction. An old behaviour is just not working. There is distress, pain, deterioration and an awareness that you can no longer continue in the same way. An acknowledgement of the need to change is the first step.

Then there is a dreaming, goal setting, fantasizing of what the new behaviour will be and how the process will take place. Leaving an old behaviour consists of saying goodbye and mourning the way things were. In the beginning of transition, there are many obstacles. Lack of faith, fears, denial are some of the roadblocks that get in the way. Once someone is on the road of change there are many feelings like fear, guilt, anger and sadness that emerge.

Sometimes a healer can serve as a tour guide, educator, catalyst, facilitator, slave driver and support to the person during the transition. The path is not straight. There are setbacks, relapses, detours and pitfalls. Usually insight, new awareness, learning, discovery and growth take place. A new behaviour begins and after 3-4 months of consistent new behaviour, a new pattern becomes embedded. There can still be relapses, slips and sometimes even going back to the beginning. Successful change becomes integrated as part of the person. It's just a matter of time before new change will endure.