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What are some romantic things to do for your wife? My name is Coach Adrian. And welcome to HAPPILY COMMITTED.
As a relationship coach, having worked with both men and women over the last decade, I have kind of learned what women want and how men can be romantic without being cheesy. And romance is a very important component to love and to relationships and so if you want to create a happy marriage or relationship you definitely need to understand the different little ways by which you can be romantic with your wife or with your girlfriend.
The first tip that I have for you today is to make sure that you are actively listening to her. Nothing can be more romantic than you being engaged and being present in your marriage and in your relationship. I've seen so many couples talk past each other and be so consumed by their own needs and desires that they start to ignore their significant other's requests and bids for attention and so if your wife - if you don't listen to your wife, you will not know what makes her tick and you will not know what she expects from you. And so in order to be romantic the first thing that you're gonna need to learn how to do is to be an active listener and to really listen without judgment - to listen to understand
The second thing that you have to think about when trying to be romantic is the element of surprise. You need to be able to surprise your wife or your girlfriend in order to come off as romantic. Women love to be surprised, especially when you show that you've put some thought behind an action or an activity. And it doesn't take much, it just takes a level of creativity and for you to give it some thought in order for her to feel special and that you actually care about her
The third thing that I want you to think about is that I want you to think about creating romantic memories, moments. Life is all about moments and I want you to be focused on creating those moments with her. Things that she can then talk about with her friends, with her children, with her parents, and sometimes we get too caught up in trying to plan for a grandiose gesture and we forget that life is about moments and connecting and experiencing things together
Physical touch is also a very, very important element of the romantic man's repertoire. So make sure that you give prolonged hugs or massages or that you lightly touch your wife to make her feel you, to make her see that you are present in her life. And I'm not talking about a quick caress or a 10-second massage. Really put your time and effort in building and developing that physical chemistry. It can go a very, very long way to building romance. You need to be physically into each other and it starts with your ability to touch the right places and to show love in the right ways through your physical touch
Also it's very important for you to be spontaneous. Don't try to plan everything. Everything cannot seem like it was basically choreographed. Okay? Spontaneity. Being able to just, on a whim, on a Friday night, take her out to dinner, or you know, on a weekend just get in the car and go on a getaway, or to bring her back to a place where you shared a memory, can go a long, long way in creating a romance and building chemistry in your relationship
You of course also have to be selfless. It is very difficult for a man to be romantic if you're just consumed by your needs and if you are unable to understand your partner's needs. And that's why I urge you to really, really try to develop this quality, this virtue of being selfless, not just with your wife, but with other people around you, other people in your life. It's difficult to just flip the light switch on and it's a lot easier to develop the right habits, to nurture the right patterns of behavior in all these different aspects of your life, in order to be the most romantic man that you can be
Lastly, and most importantly, you have to speak your wife's love language. You can be very romantic and do all of these things, but if you don't truly understand in a profound way, what our expectations are, how she wants to be loved it's gonna fall flat. And Gary Chapman wrote an amazing book called, "The Five Love Languages," helping many people to understand what makes their partner tick and how to show love to your significant other. And if you've never checked it out I highly encourage you to do so.
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