Скачать или смотреть when she finally wakes up… | Psychoanalysis on Fantasy Bonds + Toxic Relationships

The terms “people-pleasing” and “fawning” have regained popularity on social media, often discussed in the context of unhealthy relationship dynamics. These behaviors align closely with the traits of codependency. A codependent individual frequently finds themselves in toxic or dysfunctional relationships, often "attracting" narcissistic partners. This video is intended to educate the public about toxic relationship patterns and provide guidance on breaking free from them; it is not meant to diagnose anyone.

#narcissist #fantasybonds #codependency
Disclaimer: This video is not intended to diagnose anyone. It is for educational and entertainment purposes only.

CHAPTERS

00:00 - Intro + Disclaimer
02:00 - Characteristics and Origin
05:15 - Fork in the Road (familiar or unknown)
05:59 - Vulnerabilities (the beginning of the fantasy bond)
08:38 - The Peak of the Compulsion (in the shared fantasy)
11:21 - The Collapse of the Narcissists (increasing people-pleasing)
12:28 - To Stay (denial + distortion)
14:40 - To Leave (breaking generational trauma)
16:00 - The Awakened Doll (affirmations for healing)


HISTORY OF CODEPENDENCY
The term “codependent” came about in the mid-20th century, emerging from the addiction treatment field. Melody Beattie, the author of “Codependent No More,” observed that these individuals often developed patterns of controlling, caretaking, and enabling behaviors in response to the chaos created by a love one’s with addictions, primarily alcoholism. Over time, the term expanded beyond addiction contexts to describe broader patterns of dysfunctional relationships where one person is overly reliant on approval, control, or caretaking behaviors.

Self-awareness is the first step and redirecting your focus on what you can control.

Serenity Prayer: God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.

AFFIRMATIONS FOR THE AWAKENED DOLL (From the last part of the video):

-I am awakened and aware of the dynamics that have shaped my past.
-I reclaim my autonomy, identity, and self-worth—they are mine to nurture and protect.
-I have the courage to break free from cycles that no longer serve me, even when it feels uncertain.
-I acknowledge my role in past dynamics, not to blame myself, but to empower myself to choose differently.
-I release the victim mentality that once rendered me powerless.
-I vow to never lose myself again in a relationship.
-I will never elevate another human being to the status of my god.
-I establish firm boundaries to safeguard my peace and protect my well-being.
-I seek relationships based on mutual respect, shared values, and authenticity.
-I trust my instincts and listen to my gut feelings—they guide me wisely.
-I refuse to fall in love with projections or fantasies; I choose connection based on reality and truth.
-I recognize that true love is not about being needed but about authenticity, equality, and mutual respect.
-I am rebuilding my life with courage, healing, and a commitment to self-love.


TERMS we will discuss in the video and their DEFINITIONS :
Fantasy Bonds: An illusion of connection or closeness in relationships, often substituting fantasy for genuine intimacy as a defense against abandonment fears.
Internal Working Models: Mental frameworks, shaped by early attachments, that influence how individuals perceive and navigate relationships and self-worth.
Learned Helplessness: A psychological state where individuals feel powerless to change their circumstances due to repeated exposure to uncontrollable situations.
Repetition Compulsion: An unconscious drive to recreate and relive unresolved past traumas or dysfunctional relationships in the present.
Compulsive Relationships: Relationships driven by obsessive patterns or unaddressed trauma, often marked by dependency, control, or reenactment of past wounds.
Cognitive Dissonance: The psychological discomfort arising from holding contradictory beliefs, values, or behaviors, often leading to rationalization or denial.
Cognitive Distortions: Inaccurate or biased ways of thinking that reinforce negative beliefs or emotional distress, such as black-and-white thinking or catastrophizing.
Parentification: Occurs when a child is forced to adopt the role of a caregiver or emotional support system for a parent or other authority figure, leading to a loss of their own childhood and unmet developmental needs.
Love Bombing: An excessive and overwhelming display of affection, attention, and gifts used by narcissists or manipulators to gain control, idealize the target, and secure their attachment before shifting to devaluation.