Host: Allison Hope Weiner, Media Mayhem
https://www.youtube.com/user/TheLipTV...
preferential child sexual offenders
Jim Clemente:
First of all, there's two concepts that are very unique to this kind of offense, and one is nice guy acquaintance offenders and the other is compliant victimization, and the bridge between those two is grooming. Okay, so let's talk about nice guy offenders. People have, and we've long talked about, stranger danger. Everybody who talks about these kinds of cases uses the word predator or monster or evil. The problem with that is these offenders, and there are many, many, many, many, many more of these than there are monster predators and, you know, stranger danger kinds of offenders. They make up a small percentage of the actual offenders in this country. The vast majority of children who are victimized are victimized by people they know, people that we hand them over to, or people they love, people in their own family. So we have to be realistic about that.
So the nice guy offender is somebody who into the community, he grooms the community by doing nice things. He does nice things for children. He pays them attention, affection, makes them feel special, and that's how he ingratiates himself with the child. He does, he aims it also at the parents and guardians and at the community that surrounds them. That's the nice guy offender side of it.
Grooming is basically a bunch of innocent-looking behaviors that actually create a bond between other people and himself and actually throw up sort of a smokescreen or, or you know, put, create a blind spot around him because when people are looking for monster predators, they look right past the guy that's in front of him because he's smiling and he's nice and he's kind and he's helpful. That's what they think. He's actually helping kids.
Then we're talking then compliant victimization, and this is probably the most counterintuitive one of them all. It's something Paterno probably asked himself, "Why haven't, if Sandusky was doing all this for all these years, why haven't any of these kids come forward?" Not one came forward. Nobody came out and said anything about it, and it's because, especially boy victims of a male sex offender, they don't want to talk about this. I was victimized myself as a kid. I didn't talk about it for 10 years. I didn't report it to anybody because, well, I went to actually the priest in my high school, and he told me, "You know, I forgive you for your sins. Don't say anything more about this." So that then I didn't say anything for 10 years until I actually got involved and started an investigation into the case against the guy who offended against me.
But anyway, what happens is there's a whole bunch of dynamics: shame, guilt, uh, embarrassment, and, you know, the threat to your manhood or sexuality. All those things are reasons, in addition, why male victims don't come forward. And what happens is they become compliant in their victimization in that the offender is giving them things that they need as children. They need nurturing. He's taking advantage of that, or tickets, or tickets, things, or exciting adventures, or just attention, or, you know, just the basics of life. It could span a spectrum of things.
And what happens is that you have now a boy who is vulnerable and needy, and now for the first time, they're feeling special. Their first time they're getting their needs met, and at the same time, they realize now it's usually slowly over a period of time where he tests the waters, which Sandusky did very well. He tries to hide his behavior in other things like he put his hand on their knees and see if they knocked it off, and if they did, he'd do it again and again until they'd stopped knocking it off, and then he'd take it further and further and further. And you have, he'd wrestle around with them, you know, during, you know, wrestling messages, and he'd tuck them in at night and blow on their stomachs and, you know, getting closer and closer to sexual activity.
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