Advice For A Horse That Doesn’t Respond To Cues Or Like A Bit In Her Mouth

The question was “Hi there, (Please no hate, we are both learning🙏).
I bought my first horse last year, she’s a 5 year old 16hh (im 5ft) ex harness racer standardbred mare.🐴 She is the sweetest girl, not a bad bone in her body (no stereotypical grumpy mare attitude🤣) She was saddle broken in before I got her (so she’s green). For the past year, I’ve been figuring out what she likes and doesn’t like and just getting her to trust me (now she won’t leave me alone). We rode a bit, until we figured out my saddle didnt fit, and we also found out she doesn’t like the bit, so changed to a bitless bridle. This year I saved up enough to buy a properly fitted saddle and bitless bridle.
She doesn’t really listen to pressure and release (to busy day dreaming).🤦🏽‍♀️When I am on her she doesn’t have a problem, Im trying to teach you her to turn in a bitless bridle, but she doesn’t listen, she just stands there, not moving her head. She kinda understands walk on, buts walks slower than a sloth🦥, if I ask for more than that she has a child's temper tantrum (not sore), and just walks around doing her own thing. (Basically when I’m on her she pretends I don’t exist and just does her thing). Its gotten to the point that my body just naturally stiffens up getting ready to be thrown off🏇, which doesn’t help, and I don’t feel safe on her. I realise that sometimes you just have to take a leap of faith and ride through it, but id rather teach her that, thats not the right thing. She’s more comfortable in a bitless bridle, but doesn’t respond to it, and I’m really not sure if I should go back to a bitted bridle, cause she understands that. (I might get the equine dentist to come around and see what they think).
She’s not acting up cause she hates me, cause she love me and I, her. Haha. Shes acts up when its time for school. Im really stuck on this one, and Im open to anything. Needing Training advice. Thanks.👍”

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