Story of Suicide – I’m grateful I’m still here – Dylan Lewis - TRIGGER WARNING

Do you know someone who has tried to take their life? Are they happy to still be here?
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For those of you who prefer to read rather than watch, here's the transcript.
Clare
Dylan Lewis from Katharine in Northern Territory, Australia is going to talk through his experience of trying to complete suicide and that
he is grateful he's still here. Tell us your story, Dylan.
Dylan
In 2005, I had been depressed for quite a while. As a young fella, just out of uni, I didn't understand I had depression. When I tried to talk to friends about it, the advice was to have a few beers, you're a bit sad. There are a few things in hindsight, I definitely had anxiety for quite a while. I got quite drunk after a game of footy and I crashed a car. I was in Grafton and New South Wales. I woke up from the accident and was badly concussed. I couldn't remember the accident or the day leading up to it. I couldn't remember if I had attempted to take my life or not. It raised a few alarm bells with the nurses because I had previously talked about crashing a car to end it.
I saw professionals at that point and they said, "You're just a bit sad." I decided on a change of scenery, so I got a job in the Northern Territory. In 2012, I was sober and attempted to take my life. I had a very rough 12 months. There was a live export cattle ban in the Northern Territory, which sent my business broke. That compounded with a breakup. Also not dealing with anxiety and depression for over a 10 year period. I hit rock bottom, and got home one day and decided that was going to be it. I was very lucky that my more recent ex-girlfriend picked up that something wasn't right and sent a mutual friend around. They knocked on the door just in the nick of time, and I put the knife down and answered the door.
Clare
I'm feeling quite emotional because you're very much like so many of my friends from university, a lovely, strapping bloke. It can be really difficult to show your feelings. How did you manage to heal yourself over the years?
Dylan
Straight after my friends got around me. My parents flew up from New South Wales and helped me realise I needed help. So from there, I started a journey seeing psychiatrists and psychologists. There's a mental health team in Katharine. But health services can be few and far between as it's a pretty small town. Psychologists changed every 6 months, and then we can
go a year or two without one at all. I needed to step up my treatment more than anything. So I went to a mental health clinic in Sydney. I hate cities and that added to my anxiety quite badly. I've had quite a few panic attacks in cities, so going to the heart of Sydney wasn't a very easy thing to do.
But we got there and I spent 3 weeks in a hospital there, which turned it around for me.
I was told about a holistic approach in dealing with my mental health, how physical exercise, and diet, as well as regular sessions with a psychologist and psychiatrist. It's been a lot easier since then, recognising the signs. I was diagnosed with a mood disorder. Until then, I didn't have a label. No one could tell me what was going on. I had problems with medications, changing from bipolar to schizophrenia medications. I tried about 14 different medications.
Clare
Why are you grateful you're still here?
Dylan
I've actually found the confidence that I had in my teens, early twenties. Realising that anxiety doesn't have to have a hold on my life. I'm grateful to be able to share with people how they can help themselves, and help their mates. I'm very much looking forward to the next chapter with
my son and we're looking to buy a farm to have the same childhood that I had. I'm grateful for my partner as there are not many partners that you know if you don't go to work for a week or two weeks because you just can't face the world, that is understanding and sympathetic.
Clare
Do you want to tell us about the brilliant work you do for Katharine?
Dylan
Mental Mates started because in our rugby club we lost two fellas to suicide within 3 years. It's coming up to the 5th anniversary of the 1st death. Katherine's a very tight-knit community. We wondered how we could spot the signs. Mental Mates funds Mental Health First Aid courses
to help pick up the signs in the friends and family early and help get that person to professional help early. Here is the link:
https://www.mentalmates.org/ if anyone wants to donate.
Clare
Our next guest is a lady from America, Jess Stohlmann-Rainey who is going to tell us her story about not always being grateful she is still here.
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