HOW TO DEAL WITH CHURCH HURT | I'VE BEEN HURT BY CHURCH!

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see this keywords for video: How to Deal With Church Hurt / how to forgive your church / how to handle church pain, how to heal from church hurt, how to deal with disappointment,

How do you respond when you’ve given your life, your time, and a whole bunch of your money to a church only to be disappointed and hurt?

INTRODUCTION: I’ve experienced everything from a pastor in college coming on to me to another pastor calling me the N word from the pulpit during his sermon. I personally know other people who have given their hard-earned money to churches and when they were in need whether it was financial or they or their loved ones were sick no one from the church came to visit them or support them and this has left them bitter and angry towards church. So, today I want to give you just a few things to consider if you’re dealing with church hurt.
1. Don’t allow a bad experience to cause you to drift
a. When you get hurt by a church you will be strongly tempted to say, “Man forget it!” and just turn away from God and God’s people completely. God says, “Call on me IN THE DAY OF TROUBLE. So it’s in these times when God invites us to draw even closer to Him in prayer.
b. And so if you find yourself in a season when you’re not going regularly, it’s even more important to maintain a regular prayer life and Bible study because I’m telling you, if not, you can quickly drift away from God.
2. Extend Grace to your Leaders – What happens is we put our leaders and pastors on this pedestal and when they disappoint us we become crushed. Understand that they are human too. I don’t believe there is a more difficult job in the world than being a pastor. And depending on the size of the church it is very easy for a leader to oversee an email, a text message or even a request for help. So know that just because you were hurt by a church, it may not be that it was their intent to do it.
3. Don’t judge all Churches by one church
a. It’s interesting to me that when we get hurt in relationships we eventually find the courage to get into another one and if it’s a good one we are glad we did because if we didn’t we would have missed out on the person God meant for us.
b. In the same way no matter how many bad church experiences you’ve had, keep trying because there is the right church out there for you if you pray, use wisdom and ask God to lead you to it because if you don’t you could be short-circuiting your own blessings.
4. Bring it to the Church’s Attention
a. The Bible says we should “speak the truth in love.” As difficult as it is and no matter how long ago it happened, the only way that church is going to improve is if you are bold enough to sit down with the leaders and clearly communicate your disappointment with them.
b. When you do that you’re not only expediting the healing process in your own life but you are also helping the church be aware so that hopefully other people won’t have to experience the same pain you did.
c. This leads me to my next point. As hurt as you may be…
5. Resist the Urge to Speak Negatively About the Church – This is huge. What we are doing without even realizing it is slandering the church or a church leader because of our own personal experience, which in turn could cause someone else to miss out on what God wants to do in and through their life at that church.
6. Forgive those who have hurt you
a. Remember that forgiveness for the Christian is not an option, it’s a command. You absolutely do not have the choice to remain bitter and unforgiving towards others.
b. Forgiving them doesn’t mean that the pain is gone but it means that you can now pray for them, support them and even celebrate their success.

So guys I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been frustrated, bitter and angry with church or church leaders but I still go, give, support and serve because I know that the church is what Jesus is using to reach the world and I desperately want to be a part of anything that Jesus is building.

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