How to Fix A Sexless Marriage (9 Surefire Tips)

How to Fix A Sexless Marriage (9 Surefire Tips)
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In a sexless marriage? Today, I’m going to do a SUPER quick on video on how to navigate through this very frustrating problem.

If you’re in this situation, you’re not alone. There are tons of sexless marriages out there. In fact, some couples therapists claim that about 20-30% of marriages are sexless. But lucky for you, there are some strategies that you can use right now to re-ignite that spark that you have with your spouse.

But first we have to ask how much sex is enough for you. Every person is different and everyone has “their number” that will make them happy. But a University of Toronto study found that sex once a week led to a more intimate and loving marriage… any MORE than that didn’t have an impact on the marriage. However, any LESS than once a week or so led to a significant decline in marital happiness.

So how do we fix this problem? I’ll try and break it down into a few short tips.

1.) Communicate with your spouse. You don’t want to turn this into an argument because it will further push your spouse away. But you’ll want to approach the topic in a loving and caring way. Yes, this will feel a little awkward, but it’s important to let your spouse know that this is a concern that you have.
2.) Make sex a priority. If you want to have sex again, then it has to be on both of your minds moving forward – even if you have busy lives. That means setting time aside for you and your partner to relax and enjoy each other again in a quiet and intimate setting.
3.) Escalate slowly. You don’t want to try and jump into sex right away after bringing it up. You don’t want sex to feel like work or a service – you want to have sex because you both want to be intimate! You can graduate to sex soon, but for now… maybe just let your partner know that you just want to kiss him or her tonight, and that’s it. No pressure to do anything more. Sex should feel natural!
4.) Try and have FUN. I know, that’s the whole point of sex. It’s time to ask your spouse what would turn them on. Do they have any new desires or fetishes? Now’s the time to explore and get to know your spouse in the most intimate ways WITHOUT judgement. So plan fun play dates, maybe go sex toy shopping and be adventurous. Again, let your partner know that there’s no pressure to have sex at any point.
5.) Stop watching porn. Studies have shown that porn does have negative effects on sexual psychology. In fact, I know some men, for example, who can’t even achieve an erection with their spouse unless they watch porn beforehand. Cutting out porn from your lives will increase your desire to have sex with each other.
6.) Along the same lines… stop pleasuring yourself. This one’s pretty self-explantory, but it’s easier said than done. Lowering the frequency of masturbation, or cutting it out entirely, will help you and your spouse get back into the sack! I promise!
7.) Workout. Keeping fit will not only help you look better (and be more sexually pleasing to look at), but it will also release hormones that will make you want bang your partner’s brains out. So plan some couples activities that involve exercise.
8.) Again, don’t put any undue pressure on your spouse to achieve some sort of sexual goal. If you have sex and one of you doesn’t finish, it isn’t a big deal. Putting sex on the pedestal can make it even more difficult to get back into the thick of things. Just try and relax and have fun with no expectations.
9.) Maybe it’s medical. ED and other sorts sexual ailments have a compounding effect on one’s desire to have sex. Seek help from a doctor if you think this is the case for you.

10.) Finally, look at other parts of your relationship. If you and your partner both have stopped having sex, it could be an indicator that there are underlying problems with your relationship. If you think that this problem runs deep… then consider watching my free video presentation on my website at MarriageGuy.com… that’s MarriageGuy.com. You’ll be glad you did.

Okay, that’s all for this SUPER short video today, talk to you all soon!