Скачать или смотреть From Awkward Events to Engineered Relationships – Networking For Lawyers with Chris White: Now Group

If you’re a lawyer who secretly hates “networking” but loves great clients and warm referrals, this one’s for you.

In this episode of the SELL Life Podcast, I’m joined by Chris White, founder of Now Group, to rethink networking completely – especially for self-employed and consultant lawyers who don’t have time to waste at random events hoping for a miracle.

Instead of throwing 100 people in a room and praying for business cards to magically turn into briefs, Chris walks us through how to engineer small, high-trust mastermind groups that actually generate matters, referrals and long-term partnerships.

We dig into:

Why traditional networking events are so superficial (and why most value goes to the bar tab)

How introverts can out-perform extroverts at networking by playing to their strengths

The simple “5 key relationships” model that can feed a self-employed practice for years

How to use values alignment and “networking chemistry” to pick the right referral partners

Why digital networking (done well) can build deeper trust than in-person events

How to think like a mastermind builder, not just a card-collector

If you’re a lawyer trying to build a portable client base and steady referrals without feeling like a desperate salesperson, this conversation will give you a different way to think about networking, relationships and BD.

Listen if you want to:

Build a lean referral engine instead of chasing “more leads”

Turn a handful of great referral partners into predictable work each month

Stop feeling guilty about “not networking enough” and start doing it on your terms

Learn how to show up better in online rooms, not just physical ones

Links & resources
Learn more about Now Group: https://www.nowgroup.co.nz/
Connect with Chris White on LinkedIn:   / chriswhitenowgroup  
Join the Self Employed Lawyers League (SELL): thesell.life/start-here

Timestamps (full episode)
00:00 – Intro – why I wanted Chris from Now Group on the show
01:05 – “Network with masterminds” vs “network of masterminds”
03:10 – Why big-room networking feels superficial (and who it really serves)
05:00 – The data on churn: why so many people leave networking groups after year one
06:45 – Serving the same people: the real basis for strategic referral partnerships
08:20 – My “5 key relationships” model for self-employed lawyers
10:10 – Keeping 5 people happy vs trying to “work the room”
12:00 – From casual contacts to true referral partners (and how often they actually send work)
13:40 – Networking chemistry: values, hobbies and shared worldviews
15:15 – How Now Group bakes values alignment into their onboarding questions
17:00 – Why self-employed lawyers naturally share similar values and traits
18:40 – Extroverts, introverts and “biotypes” – why everyone can network, just differently
21:00 – The introvert advantage: depth, focus and small group dynamics
23:05 – How hormone chemistry (oxytocin, dopamine, serotonin) influences first impressions
25:15 – Asking honest questions with no agenda – and why that’s so rare
27:40 – “People remember how you made them feel” – designing conversations around that
29:30 – My story about Corby and why patience in communication changes everything
32:00 – Digital networking: can Zoom connections ever match in-person?
34:15 – Why most of us never learned true online communication skills
36:00 – How to deliberately create resonance and emotion in digital rooms
38:20 – What our SELL pilot is showing about connection in 30–60 days online
40:00 – Rethinking networking as an ecosystem, not a stack of business cards
42:10 – Why paid ads suit transactions, but referrals come from relationships
43:30 – The 5-year horizon: stop hunting for leads, start looking for advocates
45:10 – Changing the definition of “networking” so people actually want to do it
47:00 – Chris’ vision for Now Group and who it’s designed to serve
48:20 – How to connect with Chris and learn about Now Group
49:30 – Wrap up and next steps for lawyers who want better networking, not more of it

⭐ Highlight moments

03:10 – Chris explains why traditional networking is “great for the bar staff, average for everyone else.”
08:20 – I walk through the simple maths of 4–5 referral partners feeding a self-employed practice.
18:40 – Chris breaks down networking “biotypes” and why introverts can quietly dominate.
25:15 – How to ask questions with zero agenda – and why that alone makes you stand out.
40:00 – Networking as a forest ecosystem: trading value like roots and mushrooms, not collecting cards.