This is a house I was lured into by the promise of help when I was vulnerable, but what I found seemed like Narcissistic abuse. Owner is church leader, ranking veteran, and appointed official, seeming Golden Child, Somatic Narcissist. 50-something is a model and exotic dance boss turned housekeeper, seeming SN, Pathological Liar, vying for GC. 40-something mother volunteers for schools and claims to be a recognized leader in mental health rehab, is openly Bipolar, acted like a Cerebral Narcissist, researches and develops unusual sounds, does self-talk, and may mask Auditory Hallucinations.
Here’s what I saw and how I coped day-to-day until I could leave.
This shows their public messes and some I cleaned up, their notes (and one of mine that I took down before it was seen), hoarding, neglect, unsanitary conditions, very loud coffee system and kettle, car with loud alarms for chain smoking and 3AM arrivals or singing at the top of your lungs at 12am, etc (depending whom), violations of personal space, stalking.
Chaos seemed enforced by shaming me: "we don't worry about that here" after I arrived from a place where we do worry about cleaning our mess from common areas. Space was prioritized for hoarding and dysfunction but not to store or access needed food within reach for an injured person.
I also experienced/observed baiting, triangulation, competition, overt flirting with police & special forces, threats, staring-glaring, touching, inappropriate/no clothing, sexual harassment, shocking and gruesome stories/one-ups, intriguing stories of foreign affairs, stories of poisoning and other sabotage, talking too loud about confidential subjects, catastrophizing, micro managing, criticisms, gaslighting, meal sabotage, traumatic memories (e.g. beatings with wooden spoon), victim blaming, sleep disruption from car alarms, self-talk, and kitchen noise; verbal, psychological, emotional, spiritual, financial, and “passive” physical abuse.
Each woman told me graphic stories of severe sexual trauma and bad ex husbands, and I felt horrified and sad for them, despite their “bad timing” at breakfast or when I had asked for help. I am still confused about whether or not they used my trauma stories for information and to invalidate me, and their level of consciousness of their behavior.
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