Скачать или смотреть Communication Tips《 Part 3/3 》

Communication is invaluable. How we speak with others and how we speak to ourselves impacts us daily! Imagine feeling more confident presenting your ideas, imagine better hearing what others have to say, imagine becoming more mindful and empowered when in comes to your own thoughts. If we can master communication what might happen? Interpersonal relationships would blossom, personal development would accelerate and we’d dramatically reduce the amount of stress in our lives. In this series we go through 15 tips that will help you improve your skils. Some of these tips are Nonviolent Communication inspired, feel free to learn more about NVC in my video linked below.

► COMMUNICATION TIPS PART 1    • Communication Tips《 Part 1/3 》  
► COMMUNICATION TIPS PART 2    • Communication Tips 《 Part 2/3 》  
► NVC FOR BEGINNERS    • NONVIOLENT COMMUNICATION FOR BEGINNERS // ...  

Watch out for fake feelings. These are often the cause of discussions turning into unwanted arguments. Be careful because you may unknowingly be provoking others. You think you’re talking about yourself but what the other person hears is as an attack, because what you’ve said is actually an accusation. Pseudo feelings are not feelings, rather they are thoughts - insidious because they mask themselves as emotions when instead, they really are your judgement of another person’s actions. Watch out for these because if you accidentally attack someone, they will turn defensive or be on the offensive. In this state it will be almost impossible for them to hear anything you are trying to say. Focus on change. If the current way you’re communicating isn’t yielding progress, change the method. Call instead of text, talk in person instead of on the phone, incorporate a mediator, try writing a letter instead of talking, be mindful of your body language, pause and reconvene later if you’re feeling distracted, opt for a different location etc. Instead of asking leading questions or making evaluations, ask questions with more openness. For instance, rather than asking “What’s wrong with you? ask How are you feeling? Guessing can be appropriate at times, but when in doubt keep it open or you may offend or influence. Try checking in about what you are sharing and what whomever you are speaking with is sharing with you. So often after hearing someone’s issue we jump directly to “fixing mode” and bombard them with strategies. If this isn’t what the other person is after, they’re simply not going to hear it, and it might even make things worse. Consider that they might just want a friend to listen and empathize with them. So if you’re not certain what they would like, ask, What are you needing right now? How can I help? etc. Sometimes when we want something we can get caught up in explanation. We could however, make a short cut. The secret is - stating your fantasy! If someone else knows your ultimate goal they can assist you in getting there. When you present your idea in this way others are more receptive because they have dreams too. They naturally empathize and want to support. It’s also helping them out because it’s much clearer when you present exactly what you want.


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