Скачать или смотреть Lauren Boebert: sex scandals and UFO

SCENE START

INT. ADULT FILM SET - NIGHT

The red light is on. Two actors are simulating sex on a large bed.

CUT TO:

The craft services table, off to the side of the set. GEORGE CARLIN sits with a paper plate piled high with food. He's looking at a copy of The Independent. MIA KHALIFA comes over and sits across from him. She has a bottle of water.

MIA

-Hey, George.

GEORGE

-Hey yourself.

MIA

-You read this Lauren Boebert story?

GEORGE

-You mean the one where she's trying to impeach Biden over UFOs? Yeah. I swear, that woman is a walking indictment of the American education system.

MIA

-She's asking if there are underwater alien bases? Seriously?

GEORGE

-It says right here. Boebert asked the panel if there were “any accounts of UAPs emerging from or submerging into our waters which could indicate a base or presence between the ocean’s surface?”

MIA

-And what did they say?

GEORGE

-One guy said he didn't know about a base, but that he has a source who claims to have seen footage of an orb coming out of the ocean. That's good enough for government work, I guess.

A booming voice fills the room.

GOD (O.S.)

-There are no underwater alien bases.

George looks up at the ceiling.

GEORGE

-Oh, good. You're here. We were just wondering about that.

Mia drops her water bottle. It rolls under the table.

MIA

-I thought you were just a figure of speech, George.

GEORGE

-What can I say? I'm a man of many talents.

God's voice sounds slightly amused.

GOD (O.S.)

-You're telling me.

GEORGE

-So, no underwater bases? Not even a little one?

GOD (O.S.)

-Nope.

GEORGE

-What about that orb thing? Any truth to that?

GOD (O.S.)

-That was a weather balloon.

George and Mia exchange glances.

MIA

-A weather balloon? Seriously?

GOD (O.S.)

-I'm not very creative when it comes to cover stories.

GEORGE

-Well, that explains a lot.

God's voice becomes sterner.

GOD (O.S.)

-Listen, I've got bigger fish to fry than worrying about what Lauren Boebert thinks about UFOs. I'm trying to keep this whole planet from going up in flames, and she's worried about whether aliens are swimming around in the ocean? She should be more concerned about the fact that she's going to have to answer to me one day.

MIA

-So, you're saying she's going to hell?

GOD (O.S.)

-Let's just say she's not going to be getting a VIP pass to heaven.

George throws up his hands.

GEORGE

I give up. This whole world is a goddamn circus.

God sighs.

GOD (O.S.)

Tell me about it.

FADE OUT.

SCENE END