Скачать или смотреть Mr Webb's Bus Timetable Nightmare

Ever ran for the bus one morning and ended up falling down a dystopian rabbit hole?! Me too! This is my experience..

I was going about my lawful business
Minding my own (business that is)
Til I found myself on a blacklist
I'd like to tell you about this
So you can all bear witness

It was a normal day I woke up got myself dressed
When I left the house I could never have guessed
What was in store for me
Nothing was out of the ordinary
I couldn't have anticipated the fate that's befallen me
And when you hear this story
I'm sure you'll all agree with me

As I ran for the bus something didn't feel quite right
Just like I was being watched from out of sight by hidden eyes
I was in for a big surprise
I'd heard the rumours
There were countless concealed cameras everywhere
I knew that sooner or later whoever controls the digital data
Plays God the creators of truth and the masters of futures
Traitors - beware of the super computers
A camera never lies I swear
If you've nothing to hide then what do you care?
And when I got to the bus stop the bus wasn't there

As I studied the timetable it occurred to me
That even plans best laid will sometimes go awry
There was nothing for it but to softly sigh
And stand aside for time to pass idly by
Suddenly I was jolted from my reverie
By a glint of light that I saw out of the corner of my eye
My heart was pounding in my chest
It could not be denied
I looked for a place to hide frantically from side to side

Before I could make a dash for cover
I saw a flash and heard the click of a camera shutter
In a fluster I figured I must have triggered a motion sensor
On closer inspection
The offending camera in question
Was found to be well-hidden in a secret section inside of the bus stop sign
What happened next sent a shiver down my spine

My phone against my leg vibrated
I picked it up and an automated voice said
"Mr Webb you've been selected on account of your movements being detected"
This was quite unexpected
I tried to act unaffected
As the uninvited voice recited the terms and conditions
"Facial recognition technology's here to stay
What are you waiting for?
Sign up today
There's nothing to fear it's's really benign
There's nothing to see here
It's just a tool to fight crime!
And you're expected to toe the line

This camera analyses faces even in disguises at fifty paces
It memorises mannerisms
And recognises all kinds of races
It categorises features and files them away in databases
It's fair to say without being facetious
This camera shits on the one it replaces
When I replied "I don't want you
To keep me on file whatever you do"
The soulless disembodied voice
Reassured me that I had the choice
"It's a free country it's common sense
We'll keep you on file only with your consent
Or in the event that you commit an offence
By the way it's a crime to withhold your consent"
So I was shafted in any event

I felt about as screwed over
As a character in a bestseller
Written by George Orwell
And Joseph Heller together
My fears came to fruition when they said
"Press 1 to give your permission
For us to keep your data or
Press 2 to admit your guilt as a traitor
Or hold the line for the next available operator"

I figured it made no difference so I hung up the phone
And cast furtive glances over my shoulder all the way back home
I was so damn angry I decided to write some poetry
About how our society is living in the grip of tyranny
I wanted to reveal the truth and expose the real crime
The fact that we can never be free if the buses don't run on time
With the courage of my convictions
(The kind that's all too rare)
Armed with my pen and paper
I made a stand right then and there
I channelled my inner Voltaire
And wrote Mr Webb's Bus Timetable Nightmare

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