10 tips for professionally expressing frustration

Prepare Your Thoughts: Before initiating the conversation, take a few moments to reflect on what specifically is causing your frustration. This will help you stay focused and communicate more effectively.

Choose the Right Time and Place: Timing is crucial when addressing concerns. Find a time when your coworker or boss isn’t too busy, and consider a private setting to avoid unnecessary distractions or embarrassment.

Stay Calm and Composed: Start the conversation with a calm tone. Avoid sounding emotional or overly critical, as this can put the other person on the defensive.

Use “I” Statements: Phrasing frustrations with “I feel” statements rather than “You did” can make a big difference. For example, “I feel a bit overwhelmed by this task because of the timeline” instead of “You’re giving me too much to do.”

Be Specific: Mention specific aspects of the task that are challenging. General statements can make it hard for others to understand exactly what’s frustrating you.

Express Willingness to Find Solutions: Instead of simply venting, offer potential solutions or ask for guidance. This shows you’re proactive and open to improvement. For example, “Would it be possible to adjust the deadline?” or “Could I prioritize this task differently?”

Seek Feedback: If part of the frustration comes from unclear expectations, politely ask for feedback or clarification. For example, “Is there a specific way you’d like this task approached?”

Acknowledge the Value of the Task: Demonstrating that you understand the importance of the task shows that you’re aligned with team goals, even if you’re feeling frustrated by the workload.

Be Brief: Keep your points concise and to the point. Lengthy complaints can come across as rants rather than constructive feedback.

Follow Up on the Conversation: After sharing your concerns, thank the person for listening, and if needed, check back in later to show that you’re committed to the resolution.