Kindness or Control? | The Hidden Layers of Codependency - Terri Cole

Do you automatically accommodate others because it’s the “nice” thing to do?

Do you consistently overthink how your actions will impact others?

Are you always on the lookout for how you can help people or solve problems?

If you’ve ever wondered where the line is between codependent, caring, or controlling behavior, this episode is for you.

I’m breaking down the distinction by discussing a little-known aspect of codependency, sharing real-life examples to clarify, and providing tips on how to shift from codependency to healthy giving.

Want to learn how to cultivate healthier relationships? Join me and 30 other experts for my Epic Relationships Summit, happening October 8-10! Sign up now and get all the details: https://terricole.com/summit

Time Stamps
0:00 - Introduction
3:03 - What is codependency?
4:13 - A desire to control
6:16 - Distinction between codependency vs nice
7:54 - How "being nice" impacts our relationships
9:40 - Giving opinions non-stop (invalidating!)
13:06 - Examples of feeling overly responsible
16:44 - The cost of high-functioning codependency
17:27 - Healthily relating

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About Terri Cole
Terri Cole is a licensed psychotherapist, global relationship and empowerment expert, and the author of Boundary Boss-The Essential Guide to Talk True, Be Seen and (Finally) Live Free, The Boundary Boss Workbook, and Too Much: A Guide to Breaking the Cycle of High-Functioning Codependency.

For over two decades, Terri has worked with a diverse group of clients that includes everyone from stay-at-home moms to celebrities and Fortune 500 CEOs.

She has a gift for making complex psychological concepts accessible and actionable so that clients and students achieve sustainable change. She inspires over 450,000 people weekly through her blog, social media platform, signature courses, and her popular podcast, The Terri Cole Show. For more, see https://www.terricole.com/

Connect With Me
Instagram: https://terricole.com/ig
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Resources
Too Much: A Guide to Breaking the Cycle of High-Functioning Codependency: https://hfcbook.com

Boundary Boss Book: https://amzn.to/44DZID9

The Boundary Boss Workbook: https://amzn.to/3Ra7CRU

Insight Timer: https://insig.ht/cpKnbJB4KDb (I have a bunch of free meditations on here and love this app!)

BetterHelp: https://betterhelp.com/terricole
I’m not currently taking any new one-on-one therapy or coaching clients, but highly recommend using BetterHelp to find a therapist that fits your needs. As a team, we have fully vetted BetterHelp's resources.

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