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The requirements engineering process is effectively spit into two stages:

Requirements analysis or elicitation: the act of working with the stakeholders to document their needs
Requirements modeling or specification: the act of converting the "plain language" requirements from stakeholders into something actionable by developers

In this video, we disucss some requirements elicitation techniques that you could use to work with stakeholders to understand their requirements. We also touch on some of the difficulties of doing elicitation in general.

The number one rule, however, is just to "be kind to each other!" You (software engineers) are trying to work together with the stakeholders to solve a problem! You're on the same side! Work to understand where each of you are coming from to increase your chances of success!