Tommy Makem - The Liar

I was born about ten thousand years ago
In Bellmullet in the County of Mayo
It was me that chased the vermin, while St. Patrick preached the sermon
And I'll whoop the man that says it isn't so

Singing rightful too-ra-laddie too-ra-lee
There is no one who can tell a lie like me
You can search until you tire, you won't find a bigger liar
I've been lying since the dawn of history

I saw Eve go pickin' apples off a tree
She came over and she offered one to me
I turned and said, "Dear madam, go try your luck with Adam
I'm going home to have some fish and chips and tea."

Singing rightful too-ra-laddie too-ra-lee
There is no one who can tell a lie like me
You can search until you tire, you won't find a bigger liar
I've been lying since the dawn of history

I saw Delilah cuttin' Samson's hair
She snipped away until his head was bare
When he couldn't run away, she married him next day
And they opened a barber shop in Clare

Singing rightful too-ra-laddie too-ra-lee
There is no one who can tell a lie like me
You can search until you tire, you won't find a bigger liar
I've been lying since the dawn of history

With King Billy at the Boyne I heard them call
On his followers to follow till they fall
Then he said, "We'll win quite easy, and we'll canonize, young Paisley"
Then he up and sang a verse of Derry's Walls

Singing rightful too-ra-laddie too-ra-lee
There is no one who can tell a lie like me
You can search until you tire, you won't find a bigger liar
I've been lying since the dawn of history

In was back in sixty-two in Donoghue's
I was singing there with Luke and Ronnie Drew
Luke sez, 'Nick your singing's grand, so let's form a ballad band
And a great big hairy beard I went and grew

Singing rightful too-ra-laddie too-ra-lee
There is no one who can tell a lie like me
You can search until you tire, you won't find a bigger liar
I've been lying since the dawn of history

It was during World War II I met them all
There was Roosevelt and Churchill and De Gaulle
Then one day I nearly fainted, I was having my house painted
There was Hitler hanging paper in the hall

Singing rightful too-ra-laddie too-ra-lee
There is no one who can tell a lie like me
You can search until you tire, you won't find a bigger liar
I've been lying since the dawn of history