Befriend your Strong Emotions: with Sister Dang Nghiem

All human beings experience strong emotions, like sadness, anger, insecurity, jealousy, self-doubt, regret, yearning, etc. We all have them, but as a child we don't necessarily learn how to deal with strong emotions. Not at home, nor in school. While we do learn how to read, write and calculate, our inner world generally remains untrodden territory. And that while our strong emotions can have a huge effect on our lives.

That it is why Zen master Thich Nhat Hanh and the Plum Village community consider understanding of our strong emotions as one of the most fundamental practices. Understanding of our emotions is essential to understanding ourselves. By befriending our emotions, we befriend ourselves, or as Sister Dang Nghiem says: we have to become soulmates to ourselves.

In this sharing Sister Dang Nghiem compares strong emotions with a wave, a storm, a food (nutriment), and a habbit (addiction). An emotion by itself does not have a long life span. But our reaction to an emotion can be such, that the emotion grows bigger and stronger, like a wave or a storm, to finally overwhelm us. So, it is very important how we react to an emotion. Awareness is key. If we are not aware (of our emotions), we are lost. We will be tossed around like small boats on the high waves, and blown away by heavy storms ... and still then, we often have no idea what is happening to us.

If we are not aware for our emotions, then how can we take care of them? How can we heal and transform? Our mindful breathing, and mindful steps, as Sister Dang Nghiem shares, can bring us back to ourselves, to our body and to our mind. Only when we are present, can we see what is going on around us, and inside of us. Only when we are present, can we love, care and embrace. Through the practice of mindfulness we become steady and stable, and when a strong emotion comes up we can smile to it with equanimity (mental calmness).

Sister Dang Nghiem wrote three very personal, powerful and practical books about strong emotions and the path of healing:
1. Healing, A Woman's story from doctor to nun: https://www.parallax.org/product/heal...
2. Mindfulness as Medicine: https://www.parallax.org/product/mind...
3. Flowers in the Dark: https://www.parallax.org/product/flow...

An important title written by Zen master Thich Nhat Hanh about this topic is Taming the Tiger Within: https://www.parallax.org/product/tami...

On behalf of Sister Dang Nghiem I wish you all a beautiful journey. Coming home to yourself, a world of peace, joy, true love and equanimity is possible.

With love and gratitude,
Wouter Verhoeven

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