Скачать или смотреть Why “Just Make Mistakes” Is Incomplete Advice for Young Couples. A reaction to Wode Maya's statement

In this episode of Afterthought with Dr. Alice, Dr. Alice Mills Mai, a trauma therapist and resilience researcher, offers a trauma-informed, systems-level reflection on a piece of relationship advice currently circulating in Ghanaian media by Wode Maya: that young couples should avoid marriage counseling and instead “make mistakes” as they grow together.

Rather than reacting to or criticizing individuals, this episode slows the conversation to explore what that advice assumes about capacity, support, and emotional safety, and who it unintentionally leaves behind.

Drawing from trauma psychology and mental health, Dr. Alice examines why “learning by experience” works for some couples but can reinforce harm, avoidance, or silence for others, especially in cultures where professional help-seeking is still stigmatized, particularly for men.

This episode also clarifies an important distinction that is often missed in public conversations: marriage counseling is not the same as church premarital counseling, and the two serve different purposes in supporting couples.

🧠 In This Episode, We Explore
Why advice is never neutral
The difference between experience and skill-building in relationships
How trauma and attachment affect how couples “learn.”
Why unstructured relationships often reinforce survival patterns
The difference between spiritual guidance and psychological care
How public influence shapes cultural norms around help-seeking
Why naming support matters for reducing stigma, especially for men

🎧 About Afterthought with Dr. Alice
Afterthought with Dr. Alice is a weekly YouTube series offering thoughtful, trauma-informed analysis of trending cultural conversations through the lens of systems, the nervous system, and resilience.

Hosted by Dr. Alice Mills Mai, the series creates space for reflection after the internet reacts.

New episodes every Wednesday at 12 PM
Occasional Sunday reflections when a topic needs more space


📍 Connect with Dr. Alice
🌐 Website: https://www.centeringwholeness.com
📩 Email: [email protected]
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