Скачать или смотреть Why (some) AVOIDANTS Fear Love

Sometimes it’s not that an avoidant doesn’t love you, it’s that their fear of being fully seen overrides the connection.

Activated fears in someone who has not done the work to address these fears, will trump connection any day of the week.

These fears usually trace back to childhood, when invalidation, mistreatment, or abuse, taught them not “my parent is unloving,” but “I’m unlovable.”

That wound can make vulnerability feel VERY dangerous.
Love can 100% be there, but letting someone close enough to see all of them? Terrifying.

For many with this wound of "I'm unlovable" and/or "If they see the real me, they'll reject me.", when someone does genuinely love and care for them, they can reject it, because they literally do not know how to accept it.

Whilst there's always exceptions to the rule, this will most commonly play out in the fearful-avoidant.

Healing for these individuals means learning to reparent the inner child, build self-worth, and regulate vulnerability, often on their own before they can fully open up in a relationship.

It’s not about incapacity to love.
It’s about learning to love themselves first, learning how to regulate themselves, rewriting a lot of internal narratives around self-worth, shame, etc... so they can allow real love in.

Some people can do this within a relationship. However, for those on the more severe end of the spectrum, much of this work needs to start on their own.

If you're looking for guidance on navigating breakups, reconnecting to yourself, and rebuilding after a breakup; 1-on-1 Coaching information can be found at https://www.thereconnectionco.com/coa...

#avoidantattachment #attachmenttheory #relationshiphealing #breakuprecovery #healingjourney