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Director: Jennifer Thomas
Producer: Jennifer Thomas, Will Thomas
Cinematographer: Will Thomas
Editor: Jennifer Thomas
Colorist: Ryan K McNeal, CSI @RKMStudiosChannel
ABOUT THIS SONG/VIDEO: During the Covid pandemic, I went through what felt like a double whammy. The world shut down due to the spreading virus, my anxiety was at an all time high (I was living in daily fight or flight), and then on top of it all I had a "dark night of the soul" (otherwise known as an existential crisis). Things that used to be my grounding or safe places...no longer were. Things I always just knew to be...simply weren't.
I spent a lot of time down at "my special spot" on the beach, on "my" dock. I would pray, I would think, I would cry. But it all just felt so dark and empty. I truly felt nothing. No answers. I felt very alone. It truly does feel like a "dark night" as they describe the "dark night of the soul".
I wrote this song during that time in my life. I imagined the 4-note piano pattern being the light flashing from the lighthouse, which was the only symbolic thing at that time that brought me any sort of comfort.
"I just need to cross these stormy waters and get to the lighthouse and everything will be okay." These are thoughts I told myself. I would use the lighthouse as a metaphor for what I was going through, and the constant flashing light was the only thing keeping me looking up. At this time and during this crisis, God was the lighthouse to me.
And ultimately, I wrote this song with the ending I wanted.
I wanted the glorious light beams to come out from behind the clouds and to shine down on me as I reached the lighthouse, as if to say "Well done, you made it. You are safe. All will be well." I wrote the song with this massively strong thunderous God moment major key shift, even with church organs and chimes to signify the moment in my life when my dark night would end.
But that never happened. At least not how I saw it in my mind. Two years of this (2020 - 2022) before my own healing finally happened. Therapy, meditation, prayer, more therapy, learning, research, soul searching and so much more. And then I found my answers. And now in 2024, I am very proud of the journey I went on because it's made me who I am today. And even though it was the most treacherous waters I have ever had to cross, I would do it again to know what I know now.
When we filmed this video, believe it or not, those sunrays DID actually happen on the video shoot. It had been a pretty cloudy dark morning while shooting all of the kayaking shots, and at the end when we shot the up-close lighthouse scenes, it was truly a "God moment" where the clouds opened up, and the ending that I had seen in my mind and written into the music...finally happened.
For me, I interpret my story one way. But I created this video to help others, and to resonate with many peoples' stories. Whether you are a believer, or a non-believer...this story is for you. The ending is what YOU make of it. Maybe it was God all leading you to where you need to be, or maybe the lighthouse was you all along and it was YOUR inner strength and light that carried you through the storm. Either way, it is your journey, your story, and you get to decide. - Jennifer
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A huge thanks to Bruce Smith and Rob Nelson for the early 5:00 a.m. morning and taking Will and I out to the lighthouse to film so I didn't have to kayak the 7 miles out there (even though I've done it twice before!), and so that Will could have a boat to film from. Thanks to the Randalls for loaning us your beautiful yellow kayak that was such a brilliant color amongst the blues and greys in the footage.
"The Lighthouse" Composed and performed by Jennifer Thomas
Orchestra score composed by Glen Gabriel @glengabriel
Mixed by Brian Vibberts
Mastered by Christofer Stannow
Recorded at Abbey Road Studios @abbeyroad
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