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Yeah... well... it's a saturated around 6pm and I got bored... this is what came about.

99 Problems (Hail of Arrows)

If your having Arrow problems I feel bad for you son
I got 99 problems but my knee ain't one

[Verse 1]
An imperial patrol on the border patrol
caught me and wanna make my head roll
A horse thief who was scared took flight like a sparrow
He didn't stand a chance, they ended his with an arrows

Then it was my turn, I wasn't on the list
A Breton from High Rock, with bound wrist
I'd done nothing wrong but they didn't they care
They'd chop off my head just for even being there

One storm cloak down, cut the priest off when she said 8
Well all know that it's 9 but there is no time to deliberate
And I was up next this fate did not earn
Black wings blocked the sky and the ground began to burn

A Dragon oh hell too a tower his for his perch
The ground and the sky shook and lurched
but could I really complain about this timing attack
one more second and my neck would have meet an ax

I don't know what you would take me as
But as for me I can run with some pizzazz
I'm from rags to armor, Nord I ain't dumb
I got 99 problems but my Knee ain't one
Hit me

[Chorus]
99 Problems but my knee ain't one
If your having Arrow problems I feel bad for you son
I got 99 problems but my knee ain't one
Hit me

[Verse 2]
The stolen loot in my inventory was so ample
Why then did I have to go get caught stealing a single red apple
Now I got two choices yall, fight the whole city guard or
WULD NAH KEST! leave these suckers by door

I just wasn't in the mood so I stood were I was
the first guard to me said what he always does
"You have committed crimes against Skyrim and her people, what say you in your deference?"
I thought of all the different ways I could avoid this sentence.

Could have said I know you recognize the armor I wear
snap my figures and have thieves guild and dark brother hood here
Oh wait this is whiterun I don't have time for this game
I just crossed my arms and told the fool I was thane

So I bounced headed north when
ran into a group who wouldn't let me by, so the morons meet their end

If they had been smart they'd have more forces to fight
"FUS ROH DAH" sent Sent those sucker on a flight

They went so high they might have hit the son
I got 99 problems but an arrow ain't one
Hit me

[Chorus]
99 Problems but my knee ain't one
If your having Arrow problems I feel bad for you son
I got 99 problems but my knee ain't one
Hit me

[Verse 3]
Now once upon a time not too long ago
A Breton like myself had to strong arm a hoe
This is not a hoe in the sense of a gardening tool
But this tool having no sense, tried to cut me like a fool

I tried to ignore him and talk to the 9
Pray for him, cause some fools just love to talk with fancy lines
You know the type loud as a dragon or drake
but in a fight, not a single strike they can take

The only thing that's gonna happen is me throwing fire and lighting out
I'll burn him just like a Khajiit caught in an Elsweyr drouth
and may his friend enjoy walking on warm sands
except it will be the ashes from where there buddy now stands

And once again here is a guard saying this and that
But yo I'm in the thieves guild and you know where that's at
They can say what they want about the guild while it's light
Trust all there coin will be gone by the end of the night

I gave the guard 432 gold to put him in a better frame of mind
then asked if he suddenly felt like he'd gone blind
So go buy yourself something nice for your daughter and son
I got 99 problems but you don't want me as one
Hit me

[Chorus X3]
99 Problems but my knee ain't one
If your having Arrow problems I feel bad for you son
I got 99 problems but my knee ain't one
Hit me