Скачать или смотреть The Empire Never Sets

The Empire Never Sets

The year is 2287. The Celestial Dawn, a sleek Martian-bound vessel of the United Nations Interplanetary Initiative, hums through the void—its crew a mix of scientists, pilots and technicians all eager to plant the flag of cooperative progress on the red soil.

But halfway there, the ship’s sensors detect an anomaly: a brass-plated cylinder drifting toward them, its hull etched with curling filigree and soot-stained rivets. It’s a rocket—Victorian in design, complete with steam exhaust ports and a gilded prow shaped like Queen Victoria’s stern visage. The Spirit of the Cosmos. Propelled by the Brunel Drive, which is powered by an unfathomable combination of steam and ectoplasm. It’s pneumatic onboard functions all controlled by the Babbage Difference Engine.

The two ships dock with a hiss and a clank. Out float six astronauts in waistcoats and monocles, their oxygen tubes aligned in uniform line with their cravats. One carries a silver tea tray. Among them is Miss Elspeth Wren, the ship's resident psychic, who communicates with Earth via séance through the spirit world. Another seems to be a glowing orb on a robot body.

Their leader, Sir Archibald Featherstone, adjusts his top hat (secured with chin straps) and declares:

“We’ve just returned from Mars, dear fellows. Claimed it for England, naturally. Quite a dusty affair. The Martians were terribly polite.”

He unfurls a parchment map of Mars, marked with regions like New Devonshire Crater and The Royal Basin of Her Majesty’s Triumph.

The UN crew stares in disbelief.

“You claimed Mars?”
“Indeed. Planted a flag, sang God Save the Queen, and held a cricket match in Olympus Mons. The wicket was dreadful and some of those glowing orb fellas toss a mean googly”

They offer a ledger of Martian customs, translated into Victorian etiquette. It includes rituals like “The Ceremony of Dust Exchange” and “The Polite Refusal of Gravity.” They also present the Martian ambassador—a glowing orb named Nigel—who now wears a bowler hat and speaks in clipped Received Pronunciation. Tea had proved a hit on Mars and Nigel was eager to begin negotiations with the East India company on behalf of the Red Planet, or Barsoom as the natives called it.

Eventually, the UN crew realizes the truth:
These visitors are not from Earth’s past, but from a parallel dimension where the British Empire never waned, steam never died, and where Queen Victoria’s 5th clone is the current incumbent on the throne. Unperturbed by this revelation Featherstone assured them that with a few adjustments of the Brunel drive they'd soon get back to their own dimension. The proper one where those dashed colonials hadn't been so foolish.

The crew of the Celestial Dawn offer Nigel some coffee which unexpectedly incites huge offence for some unfathomable reason. Something tied into obscure Martian culture and leads to him proclaiming imminent war. Elspeth calms him down somewhat and he and the two crews share tea, debate the ethics of interdimensional empire, and co-author a treaty titled The Concord of Steam and Stars.

The Victorian rocket departs with a puff of steam, leaving behind a monocle floating in the airlock.