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Chapter Two: Doubt
In this chapter of my conversion story, I open up about the internal battle that almost destroyed my faith. Reformed theology promised clarity, order, and truth—but beneath the surface, I found deep contradictions that left my soul restless and wounded.
This wasn’t just an intellectual struggle. It was personal. I wrestled with questions about God’s justice, predestination, assurance of salvation, and the nature of grace itself. I felt like I was losing my grip on a God I longed to love—but who, under this system, often felt distant, arbitrary, and unreachable.
This is the story of how Reformed theology shaped me, tested me, and nearly led me to walk away from Christianity altogether… and how, in the darkest hour, God was still quietly calling me home.
If you’ve ever felt like faith was slipping through your fingers—or like truth might be more than just a system of doctrines—this chapter is for you.
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