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When an avoidant starts to withdraw
Complete transcript:

We live together, but I'm checked out of this relationship. What's going on actually don't know couldn't tell you. All I know is that this relationship feels like a full-time job; you're always asking me questions about what I feel and where I am .

And it just feels so draining with the right person relationship should feel easy and this just doesn't. So, me asking about your feelings and wanting to know what you're up to is just a part of being in any relationship. It's not me being difficult. I get the feeling that you just want to come and go and do what you want and you don't want me asking any questions.

It seems like you want me to just accept the bare minimum with a smile and at the same time, you just admitted that you're checked out of the relationship and I could sense that which is why I've asked you for a few months if something was up. And you told me that I was making a big deal out of nothing.

Yeah, that's part of my pattern i'm really uncomfortable when you come to me and ask me about my feelings. Vulnerability is my biggest fear,r and I can't do direct communication. So I do something called deflection, where I try to make you the issue so that I can avoid my own feelings if you're the issue, then I don't have to look at the role I play in my relationships.

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