ITV 1 - Continuity and Adverts - 2004 (7)

Bopping around from channel to channel this week, aren’t we? No particular reason. Just felt like hitting the “random” button for variety. Continuing on with another ITV 1 clip from 2004, Nicolas Cage is still going strong in Gone in Sixty Seconds. But it’s ad time, and we begin with a bottle of Stella Artois causing uproar on a ship. Given all the violent pub fights there’ve been, I guess it’s not too outlandish.

We’re told again there’s a sale on at Debenhams – it’s probably still on now, to be honest – and then Johnny Vaughan presumably loses his mind, since he treats his whole life like a bombastic musical. Beware – Capital FM can kill instantly.

Kindness is rewarded with cruelty, and then somehow a car in an advert for the Ford Focus Edge. A guy then shows off his fancy football footwork in an advert for T-Mobile, but I bet you that ball has a string on it. Or it’s CGI.

How did they get Brian Blessed to advertise Zoo magazine? It’s crazy to hear him yelling about this borderline pornographic dishrag, but even crazier is the appearance of a “Simpsons Exclusive” on the cover. You know it’s fictional, right? What were they going to reveal, that Bart Simpson is voiced by a girl, therefore making him transgender? Lunatics, the lot of ‘em.

Samsung than reveal that the secret to their success is that every piece of technology they sell is powered by a vast galaxy, most likely consuming the life force of billions of innocent souls. They’re coming for you next.

After another promo for Japanese antics in Tarrant on TV, Motorola takes us back to Nicolas Cage.