Скачать или смотреть How to Handle Kids Tantrums

Kids feel everything – and particularly emotions – very passionately. The catchphrase “toddler tantrum” isn’t simply a saying, there’s a scientific reason why they are such a big deal.
https://www.churghus.com/2019/08/how-...
Toddlers have not developed enough frontal cortex capacity to have the self-regulation skills to control their behavior and their reactions. When these strong feelings strike and they become upset.


Tantrums are a perfectly normal form of communication for toddlers, even when they’re of epic proportions. It’s understandable that most parents would love it if they didn’t take place in the grocery store check-out line, or at the library when you’re supposed to use your inside voice.

Easy Steps to Preventing Toddler Tantrums and Helping Your Child Feel Heard
Involve Children in Decision Making and Choices
Many tantrums are a result of children feeling powerless and like they have no control over their lives.

One way to help your toddler feel in control is to allow them to be a part of the decision-making process by offering two choices. Whether it’s picking out lunch, their choice of activity, book or use of time.

Here are some examples:

“Would you like to go to the park or go for a walk this morning?”
“What do you think, Peanut Butter and Jelly or Grilled Cheese for lunch today?”
“Do you want to do books before or after bath time tonight?”
All relationships require to give and take, especially with toddlers.

Most Tantrums Happen with Toddlers are Tired, Hungry or Overstimulated
Make time to Connect With Each Child
Children desire to feel loved and accepted by their family, and most of all their parents or you may see an uptick in negative behavior. That’s because children seek out attention – in any form, positive or negative. When they feel like their reserve is empty. They will act out for attention, likely in unwelcome ways.

Make time each day to spend 10 minutes with each of your children to connect with them. If you can, set aside time at the same time of day to connect and you’ll both come to look forward to that shared time daily.

Emotion is a Window into Your Child’s Heart
It’s important to remember that emotion, particularly anger is a defense mechanism to something more that’s going on under the surface.

Take the time to probe deeper and find what’s at the root of such strong emotions. Is it hurt, vulnerability, fear, pain?

Acknowledge & Empathize With the Child’s Feelings
It’s hard for toddlers to express themselves and state how they feel when they don’t know what it is exactly they are feeling.

This is where it’s important for parents to step in and help them acknowledge their feelings and state what it is they want. (and start the building blocks of developing emotional intelligence.)
For example:

“You seem really sad right now. Is it because your brother wants to play by himself and you really want to play with him?”
“I see you’re mad. We need to use our words to tell our friends we’re not doing playing with the shovel so they don’t take it. Are you mad because you lost your shovel?
Once you acknowledge their feelings and give the space to open up to you, you can also set a limit on behavior that requires curbing.
“I can see you’re frustrated Emily won’t share with you, but we don’t use our hands to hit.”
“I saw that you didn’t like the book I picked out, but we don’t throw our books of they’ll break and we can’t read them anymore.”
“I know you’re mad I said you cannot have juice with breakfast, but maybe it can be a special treat this afternoon during snack time if we do a good job cleaning up our messes today.”

It’s perfectly OK for children to feel upset and angry. And during a tantrum is a great opportunity to help them understand, recognize and sort through their emotions.

Love Your Child Through the Big Emotions

The point is to let your child expose their feelings to you in a way they feel safe with.
No matter how your child responds to you, the one thing he’ll always need is to know you’re there during and after the meltdown, and that you love him.

Match his intensity with calm reassurance, and counter his anger with empathy and kindness.

If you match his intensity on your own, you can’t provide the safety net he depends upon you for.
Once the Meltdown Has Passed…
Once the crying and shouting have subsided, take a moment to connect with your child. This isn’t a reward for their behavior. But a reassurance that you are a safe place for them to share their feelings. Plus, the dopamine release from cuddling and hugging is good for both of you, too.

Follow Us:
FACEBOOK:   / churghus.magic  
TWITTER:   / churghuss  
INSTAGRAM:   / churghus  
YOUTUBE:    / @churghus9136  
PINTEREST:   / churghus  
#churghus #parenting #kidstantrums