i ended up opening up to myself

I decided to video and talk to myself with no real goal in mind and ended up having a cathartic experience with myself.

I started this spontaneously, inspired by a very close friend of mine, I felt like talking aloud. I'm not particularly good at it, in fact, I pause very much when I speak. I cut pauses that didn't fit or seemed too much but for the most part, much of this is unedited.

I talked about my upbringing, how I moved around, and how my mindset changed from scuffed to wide eyed scuffed to somewhat fluffed. I spoke specifically about my feelings moving when I was younger and how that changed as I grew up, resulting in my change of personality. I referred to particular moments that came up in mind, but I also vaguely referred to things never mentioned in the video. I build upon that change.
I end up stating it bluntly.

And from that it snowballed into now.

I was surprised at myself at the end. Both at how I reacted physically and emotionally. I was somewhat uplifted. More at peace.

I completely understand how boring this type of video could come off. It's like reading the back of a shampoo bottle, you don't do it unless you find yourself in the situation. As this was a product of spontaneity, there's no real thread or proper ending this 17 some minute video, which only adds on to the experience.

But if anything, I would recommend this. You might find things coming to the surface you weren't expecting.

And after all, who listens to you the most than yourself?