I beg to be bruised

Original song by Layla-Ruth

Lyrics:

I leave bruises on everything I let go of
I hold on with my teeth I grasp till I bleed
These relentless marks of my indecision
I’ll stay a bittersweet small town girl
Boredom and loneliness is what I was meant for
A promise that I would be forgotten here

suddenly I’m 14 again crying
somehow I feel small with those heavy eyes on me
Melancholic and mournful over someone I’ll never be
Cause my worth is confined to a box named “please”

Cause those were the words that made me weak you made me weak
My anger is wet tears and sweaty hands balled up in my clothes
And someday I might sigh in relief
With a lullaby sung through my gritted teeth
So I beg to be bruised
I beg to be bruised

Wrap my old letters around my throat words haunting me like a ghost
Like a shadow like a whisper like a echoed name I no longer hear

Melancholic and mournful over someone I’ll always be
I’ll always be I’ll always be
While my value is confined to a phrase called “use me”

Cause those were the words that made me weak you made me weak
I just can’t give up let go change and move on forgive forget and just let it be
Let me be let me be

Cause those were the words that made me weak you made me weak
My anger is wet tears and sweaty hands balled up in my clothes
And someday I might sigh in relief
With a lullaby sung through my gritted teeth
So I beg to be bruised
I beg to be bruised
I beg to be bruised
Cause then I know I’m hard to lose