"I Want to Leave but..." Exploring Reasons to Stay or Go After Betrayal

Do you often swing between wanting to leave your relationship or remain in it after uncovering betrayal? You're not alone. Kristin Snowden, MA, LMFT, CDWF is a licensed therapist and coach that specializes in helping individuals and couples in crisis after infidelity, emotional abuse, and/or uncovering addiction issues. She provides education and tools to help you move through the confusion of how to move forward during relationships crisis. She explores the multi-faceted considerations that go into deciding if you should stay or go: kids, finances, logistics, mental/physical complications, your partner's recovery status, and more. This is for anyone in relationship crisis exploring answers and a path to healing and recovery. Relationship crisis can be spurred from uncovering an unknown addiction, cheating/infidelity, porn use, and other forms of betrayal.
(This is educational, NOT THERAPY)

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Timestamps:
2:20 Theres shame, hurt, and fear involved in staying or leaving
6:38 Remember you don't have to decide today and you can always change your mind
6:45 Some reasons to consider to stay or go: kids, finances, logistics, dependency needs, mental/physical issues, feel more in control overseeing kids and partner
8:45 Don't feel pressure to decide immediately
9:00 Loving and living with an addict can create a lot of confusion, increased blame, shame, manipulation, making decision-making so much harder
10:20 List of Things to Consider Before Leaving
10:30 Are there any physical/emotional safety issues? Is your partner exposing you to danger or irreparable harm?
12:05 How will staying/leaving impact your mental/physical health along with your other relationships?
14:03 Where is your partner in his/her recovery? Still denying, minimizing, blaming and shaming? Or is there a level of accountability, structure, empathy and compassion
15:11-15:46 Is your partner willing to accept influence from others?
15:50 the recovery path can be 3 steps forward, 2 steps back
16:30 What does your support network look like?
17:40-18:23 How a group can help you move forward when you feel stuck
19:05 Group support can help with validation, bring clarity, remind you of promises made to yourself
20:30 Are there kids involved? How does the relationship impact the kids and your relationship with the kids?
21:50 Are any of your physical or emotional needs being met in your relationship?
23:11 Have the boundaries and consequences you've set thus far worked up to this point? Might removing yourself from the environment leave the addict/betrayer to deal with his/her issues?
24:50 What is your addict partner getting from staying in this relationship?
25:30 Is there a foundation of love, respect, hope? Do you like parts of your partner?
26:08 Gottman's quiz on "is it time to leave"
35:03-36:15 What betrayed partners need from their partners to heal
41:30-42:39 Important points on recovery

Get my FREE eBook: A Guide to Navigating Relationship Crisis: https://bit.ly/RelationshipCrisis to set you down a path toward healing and clarity. It’s a small collection of education, important first steps, and resources to get you through the initial crisis period.

Need help and guidance now? Get Kristin's Relationship Masterclass: Resiliency & Recovery Access her full online library of eye-opening content, helpful tools, comprehensive workbook, and much more. Options for one-on-one LIVE COACHING with Kristin http://bit.ly/RRROnlineProgram

**Join Kristin's LIVE (zoom) WORKSHOPS for betrayed partners and beyond. New sessions posted. http://bit.ly/KristinsWorkshops

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KRISTIN'S FREE LIVE WEBINARS EVERY ODD MONTH, THE SECOND WEDNESDAY OF THE MONTH AT 9:30 AM (pacific time) through SexandRelationshipHealing.com . Zoom link: https://zoom.us/j/244109360
#betrayaltraumarecovery #couplesincrisis #couplestherapy #addictionrecovery #Infidelity #crisismanagement #healthyrelationships

Kristin is the co-author of Life Anonymous: 12 Steps to Heal & Transform Your Life http://bit.ly/LifeAnonymousBook