Environmentalist Nene dumps Tons of Garbage into a River (in Minecraft) [hololive/engsub]

Nene Momosuzu plays Minecraft.

Original stream:    • 【Minecraft】🍑氷の道を無限に作る🍑【桃鈴ねね/ホロライブ】  

Nene's channel:    / @momosuzunene  

Thank you to Jin of ‪@yametekudasubs‬ and TellowKrinkle for QC help!

For the dirty joke at the end, see here and scroll down till you see the Tweets: https://neetola.com/kirakira/ (WARNING: You will see ASCII 'art' that you cannot thereafter unsee.)




Tanigou Marsh was a staple of my town. The Omae mallard wintered in the tepid waters; the Irongrip Mountain Ape would come down from her nest to fish for blue oopa loopas in the summer; in the spring, the White-haired fox would watch the young boys splash and play in the water; and when fall came around, the Nuremberg rabbit would set deadly, Halloween-themed traps.

One day, the marsh dried up. The runoff from the mountains had been blocked by something. Beavers, maybe. Perhaps a build-up of deadfall. As the resident environmentalist of my town, I decided it was my duty to figure out what had caused the blockage.

I wore my alpaca-wool poncho, put on my tortilla-shell sombrero, slathered on sun-screen made from guano and molasses, and brought enough trail-mix to last me the length of any trail.

I stepped into the woods and began roughing it. The country was hard at first with no clear trail to follow. But when I decided to cleave to the river and walk up the dry riverbed over the water-smoothed stones things got easier.

I camped the night out under the stars. I saw an ice-tailed comet streak the sky and an unexplainable urge to chase my friends with a hatchet came over me for a second. I also thought I should enter a Tetris tournament when I got back. That comet was probably an omen of the bad turn to come, but I didn’t know that at the time.

I awoke a little sore but well-rested. I filled up on trail-mix and reapplied the sunscreen and off I went up the riverbed. Eventually, I passed under the leeward side of a sheer wall of stone. I noticed that rudimentary drawings had been carved into the rock. Bears, seals, flowers, rainbows. Stepping back to gain perspective, I saw that the letters ‘ENENMI’ had been engraved into the stone wall.

I left the wall behind, feeling perplexed, unable to shake the notion that I had seen something beyond the range of human understanding.

Not long after, I started seeing garbage littered about the riverbed. Empty packages of gummies, bottles of fruit and vegetable juice, several copies of the 28th volume of Dragon Ball. A fire extinguisher. The trash became denser the further I went and soon enough, I found the blockage. It looked like a segment of the Great Pacific Garbage Patch had been relocated to block the river.

“Ah, trash!!! Don’t need this!!! Don’t need that!!!”

A girl with pinkish-blonde hair was digging through a backpack and throwing garbage behind her indiscriminately. I could feel the righteous indignation boil and rise up within me, and I called out to her.

“Hey! What do you think you’re doing!? Did you do this, block the river?”

The girl twirled around and stared down at me from her place up on the bank. Her expression suggested she couldn’t distinguish me from the trash scattered around.

“Who said that!!? All I see is gomi!!!”

“I did, you green-eyed goof! You have to clean all this up!”

“Haaaa!?!” She picked her nose with her pinky and flicked something onto the great trash pile. “Why!!? It’ll despawn in five minutes anyway!!! I wouldn’t stand down there if I were you!!!”

“Garbage doesn’t just despawn! You have to be conscientious! You have to take care of the Earth and not poison it! This is the worst environmental offence I have seen in all my years of being an environmental activist! And I helped clean up Exxon Valdez! Seriously, how did you even get this much garbage out here? This doesn’t make any sense. You know what? I’m reporting you to the Goody-Two-Shoes Commission of Zero Emissions. Let’s see how you like paying that fifteen-dollar fine!”

The girl made no reply. I stood there with my hands on hips, leering up at her, filled with the warm, fuzzy feeling of moral righteousness. I made a mental note of how I had schooled yet another miscreant about the sin of mistreating the planet. I was going to buy myself a soy milkshake when I got back to town.

Then the garbage despawned.

Twelve hours later I washed up on the shore of Tanigou Marsh. My tortilla sombrero sat like a soggy pancake on my head. I had lost my pants and my left shoe and sock in the deluge. I’m pretty sure my arm was broken in at least seventeen places.

But I did it. I brought the water back to the marsh.

That deserves a soy milkshake.


So anyway. I’ve been subscribed to Nene’s channel for about eight months now. I highly recommend it. Here’s the link:    / @momosuzunene  

You won’t regret it ;)