Preety Li Hui Zhen Theme Song 电视剧《漂亮的李慧珍》主题曲

Steven Wright on Language Tapes

I bought one of those tapes to teach you Spanish in your sleep. During the night, the tape skipped. Now I can only stutter in Spanish.

The Unathletic Camper’s Baseball Glossary

Baseball bat: a wooden or metal bar that can easily fly out of someone’s hands.

Foul ball: a moment when you think, Holy @#$%, I got a hit!

Babe Ruth: someone who people tell you was also overweight.

Right field: a quiet place where you can sit for long stretches and play with dandelions. Until suddenly you hear a clang and some shouting and immediately understand life is about to get much harder.

Fly ball: when the sun drops a boulder on your head.

Shortstop: a position that involves mostly ground balls and that you think maybe you can play.

Line drive: the reason you can’t play shortstop.

Innings: the amount of time left before afternoon snack, divided by nine.

Marc Philippe Eskenazi, in the New Yorker