Stacy's Mom (Magic: The Gathering Parody)

Playing against tokens? Hope for the best.

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LYRICS:

Stacy’s making a million tokens again
I’m sitting looking bitter while he’s blossoming
He’s got more forests and soldiers than the Viet Cong
He says it’s “junk” but I think that description is wrong

Well I’m probably gonna lose, my life’s down to two
But when I draw my final card I know just what to do

Ratchet Bomb has got it going on
To draw one I have waited for so long
Stacy, can’t you see? They’re zero CMC
I know it might seem wrong but I’m-a crack this Ratchet Bomb

Ratchet Bomb has got it going on

Stacy, do you remember when I sac’d that bomb?
You’d just cranked out eight humans like the Octomom
He had all these creatures, oh it looked so bad
And Secured the Waste like an inside-out bag

I’m not sure what I’ll side in for the final game
I think I have you beat? How can you make that claim!?

Ratchet Bomb has got it going on
To draw one I have waited for so long
Remy, can’t you see? They’re all 3 CMC
This joke’s gone on too long (Yeah…) I’m in love with Ratchet Bomb

Filmed on iPhone during quarantine.

Music tracks, background vocals, and mastering by Ben Karlstrom.

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