"Apple vs Microsoft"

Anotha one, fresh out the easy bake oven....

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Let me know who you wanna see battle in the comments.


Lyrics:

Apple:

First off, Micro or soft, idk which one to pick,
When both of those adjectives do an adequate job describing yo dick
Why you tryna fuck with the big dog, bro? Shoulda never stepped foot in this pit,
Cuz my AK come equipped with the latest tech plus an apple brand banana clip
BAUM BAUM
I’ll shoot the glass out ya windows, I don’t play games, bro this aint Nintendo,
-Check-ya-heartbeat on-my apple-Watch it’s the same as this muhfuckin tempo
136, you picked the wrong tree to bark up, my apples be poisonous bitch
Take a small bite of my shit, and its RIP PC, you will cease to exist,
Fuck it
Dog, my visions professional,…see you not making moves, like a vegetable
…Take you out of this game like a technical
Hit 2030 and triple my revenue
Move that decimal, put that red.. dot… right on yo head make it pop
Point the viewing hole.. in ya skull at the podium, and see my place at the top
Apple, what the folks. Pray. For. down on they knees at the chapel,
People say Silicon Valleys a battlefield… nah bitch it’s my castle
I run this game better than you run your own damn Apps,
(people!)
Don’t go broke tryna fix your shit PC, just invest in a Mac
Look,
I feel bad for yo users, why you act so abusive?
Treat ya fans like enemies, then you hold meetings to fig-ure out why you losing?
viruses, malware a UI so clunky no one wants to use it
Plus-You-built X-BOX up-to-be great Now you pissin away all its fuckin exclusives
I can hear ya boy Phil Spence yap at the press with those stupid excuses
I give out stickers with all of my products, you should be giving out nooses
All of yo justifications, just sound like a whole bunch of bullshit to me
And to these poor souls who paid for a damn Series X, when they already owned a PC
DAMN
Your ecosystem is bullshit, there’s no loyalty from ya fans,
My ecosystem’s perfection, Listened to Steve and we stuck to the plan
Easy to use, slick and professional, and it looks sexy as fuck in ya hand,
Give anyone of my products to boomers or babies in 2 minutes they’ll understand
I’m done witchyo bitch ass
Had some fun witchya bitch ass
Better run, wit a quick dash
Or I’m gunnin yo bitch ass
Whoops, too late, checked the mag and there’s no bullets left
If I was you, I would be seeing red,
But all you gone see is a blue screen of death.



Microsoft:

Look at this shriveled up fruit
Spitting bars, like he think he’s the truth
You killing me? Homie show me the proof
I’m beatin yo ass in the bank and the booth
That last stanza, what the fuck was that?
Ya rhyme scheme, it need to go to class
“Bitch ass rhymes with Bitch ass”,
Dog here’s a number do some quick math
3.19 trilly minus your net worth trick tell me, what is that?
I ardy checked, it’s 540 Billion bitch,
Now bow down where this dick at,
Micro and soft, real original bro you come up with that all by yourself?
Well it gets large and hard when I think about those Vision Pros sitting there on the shelf (FLOP)
Nobody want that shit, Cut ya losses and dump that shit,
Leave that VR stuff to Zuckerberg brodie you sinking you oughta just jump that ship.
My users love my software, while yo users sit there stuck
…Yo ecosystem is an eco-prison, and your inmates stay locked up
People, you can run windows on anything, MacOs, ya shit out of luck,
Want a tablet that works with your Mac but don’t cost you an arm and a leg well you’re fucked
It’s time to get out that shitty cult, and join us in the promise land
Where you can use any devices you want, cuz we don’t treat them contraband,
Tim, Ya companies so fuckin lame, it coulda been something great, what a shame,
You’re sellin that overpriced junk for 2 grand and it can’t even play any mufuckin games,
I should be mad on principle, but actually I’m quite grateful,
You left the whole, Computer-gaming-market wide open for me, so thank you
I owe ya one, fuck it I owe you like 400 Billy,
Your products don’t run the worlds most profitable form of media homie that’s silly
And yes, I did build xbox up to be great and then shared our console exclusives
What? you think hardware’s where the money’s at? Fuck no, bro it’s games, are you stupid?
Bruh, why am I even asking, the answer is so crystal clear,
You must be dumb as shit, to think folks’ll buy the same damn phone year after year,
Hold up? They actually do? Someone please tell me that’s not really true,
Well I guess it makes sense that you’re mega fans are as silky-smooth-brained as you
They buy AirPods, Apple Watches, iPhones and Macs for the price of their soul,
Better off buyin stock in ENRON, or the same wack Bored Ape NFT twice in a row,
At least then, they won’t be funding the downfall of Modern tech design as we know it,
Same blueprint every time that they show it, well my dick got rounded edges too, bitch Blow it