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TORBEEZY
Sampla: Big Mama (Roxanne Shanté) [Léir.: Grand Daddy I.U.]
Príomhfhonnadóireacht: Torby
Fonnadóireacht Taca: Jake Óg Mac Siacais
Scríofa ag: Conor Torbóid
Taifeadta ag: Attic Studios
Innealtóir Fuaime: J. Wilson
Measctha ag: J. Wilson
Máistrithe ag: J. Wilson

Save all the drama, ‘cause here comes the big llama
Hit hard, spit harder causin’ head trauma
It’s givin’ zees, let me grab all my pyjamas
And that’s period but baby I’m a wee comma
‘Cause I won’t stop until I get to the top
Big belly is the only thing about me flops
Try to cut me, promise you can get cropped
Come against me, no I don’t want clapped
Conorexia to Torbesity, please
When I say shush everybody must cease to speak
No matter what I say, you won’t cancel me
I don’t give a fuck ‘cause I always keep my pencil steep
Now let me tell ya ‘bout them New Lodge ones (gis your guds)
Anytime I went in, never left with a shoe once
Ask how and I’ll tell ya that it’s wee buns
Torbitts and the Browns, shout out to my cuns
Meet my mate at the shops up in Ardoyne
All these auld cunts screamin’ ‘bout Battle of the Boyne
Oh mummy no ya must be jokin’
Got his fingers in her hole, call the cops, that’s bin hoakin’
Now I’m sleazy but that’s far too easy
I know it’s called Twat-dell but try a little more teasin’
And ya might get pleasin’
Take it from me, formally known as Big Torbeezy


Now let me tell ya ‘bout the Shankill
I wouldn’t dare walk through ‘cause I wanna keep both my ankles
But I love Mikala’s Kitchen
Just wouldn’t eat in it (no fuck), don’t know what’s really in the chicken
And what about them Malone cunts
Them vote Alliance, ‘O please leave me alone’ cunts
But won’t say squat shit about Malone House
Doggers doin’ dirties, wouldn’t do it in their own house
Hip-hoppin’, tik-tokin’, lip-lockin’
But somehow still find time to slip cock in
Never wanna actually shame the broads
It’s all about buildin’ bridges
When I say it, don’t mean Shaw’s
So ya better shave your Belvoir
Got some buck from Turf Lodge
And I heard he’s a good receiver
First thing’s first, ya wanna get yourself a good wash
Don’t go to Ballymurphy wouldn’t know a good splash
Hit up the Cregagh
“No mate stayed with a bird and came out with scabies”
Pass me a reefer
Take a puff like a big queefer, screechin’ like big Aretha
Puts me in mind of big Bernie takin’ a stand
On big Nolan, squealin’ ‘That was Short Strand’
But here what about Jeffrey?
Donald’s son from Kilkeel has the state dead in a hefty
Then he led Lagan Valley on
Probably has a wank and goes to sleep with a bali on, carry on
Must be tryna get a suck on his wee willy
But would ya really want that from Little-Pengelly?
Now I know that was lousy
But like a big dog you know it’s so hard to house me
Let’s be honest all those rats are measly
Jeff wants a bite but I told him that is not seemly
Not to mention that he makes me queasy
Take it from me, formally known as Big Torbeezy


Now what’s the craic with auld Strabane?
Identity crisis much, like it’s trans for its homeland
Can’t even choose a county
Never knew Strabane to be flaky like a big Bounty
Suppose it comes with the territory
It’s like curry in your yoghurt livin’ next to big Gregory
I’ll throw punches when they ring the bell
He’ll be ragin’ when I tell him that I’m camp as well, oh well
That’s really just the dupers
Voters so thick-skulled
Wouldn’t even get my bloopers
‘Nois labhraímis ar Lurgan
Remember all them rumours last month
When they out purgin’, you would need a surgeon
All the blood splurgin’, cars swervin’
Particularly your man making trips to Ballyfermot
But won’t ya just realise? (What?)
Was gonna try to redeem but I can’t think of nothin’ nice
Now I’ll never be stroked
Not by you, him, her, no not some random scrote
If you’re being wishy-washy, I’ll stop the boat
Pump the brakes, leave ya hangin’ like a big coat
Your ma givin’ sniffles like she got some good coke
Call me big smoke
Call me big smoke
Finish ya off in about two tokes
Back to the point, I don’t wanna bore though
But ya know I’m sticky like pancakes from the Ormeau
What about stab city being Limerick
Think I’ve seen sharper ones up in Twinbrook
They say, “What ya mean?”
I can’t apologise for my mouth, so obscene
But don’t be mistook
Talkin’ all that rubbish might just get your bin took
Let me move on to Armagh, whose ma?
All the chicks goin’ out, find the baby’s new da
Big Dublin hoodlum with a real rough brogue
Shits herself when he tells her suck on my big toe
But that’s all today from Big Torbeezy
Keep it all real, just a geg, looks easy
So keep an eye out for me
Carol is my ma but Roxanne gave birth to me